


Another Kind of Education

by samwise_baggins, Steve-Bucky-Stucky (Chemical30)



Category: Captain America (Movies), Gifted (2017), Kings (TV 2009), Once Upon a Time (TV), Political Animals, Thor - Fandom
Genre: Alcohol, Burns, Craglist, Domestic Violence, Drunk Sex, Enabling, M/M, Medical Conditions, Medical Inaccuracies, Self-Medicating, Smoking, Stranger Sex, Vaping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-02
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-09 19:14:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 29,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12894879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samwise_baggins/pseuds/samwise_baggins, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chemical30/pseuds/Steve-Bucky-Stucky
Summary: Without a place to live and a week away from University starting, TJ has to accept an apartment offer from Cragslist.





	1. Apartments by Craglist

Huffing out a breath, Thomas _‘TJ’_ Barnes’ eyes scanned the screen in front of him as he ran a frustrated hand through his disarranged brunet curls. There were several boxes shoved in the corner of the tight living room, the blanket he’d been using while he slept on the couch folded neatly next to him on top of a pillow. 

“I’m sorry, Teej, you know I am,” his eldest brother, Jack, stood in the doorway. “But I need that room for Bucky’s helper.” He looked worried and exhausted and very harried.

“Yeah, I know,” TJ grumbled, pale eyes flickering from the screen to his eldest brother.

Watching his baby brother, Jack ventured, “Are you sure you don’t want to just move back on campus this semester? Might be cheaper?”

“Already checked that, Jack,” TJ rolled his eyes, looking back to his screen, “the semester starts in a _week_. There aren’t available rooms.”

“And no one’s looking for roommates this late in the summer?” Jack sounded frustrated. “I . . . maybe I can find a way to slip you in with . . . “ he sighed, not finishing that thought. “Or maybe the other students are advertising elsewhere? Or maybe someone just needs a roommate and doesn’t care if it’s a college kid?”

“Oh,” TJ drawled sarcastically, looking at an ad placed on Craigslist for a roommate, “this one here says I don’t even have to pay rent! I just gotta let them have sex with me anytime they want,” he looked back at his older brother, “think that one will work. Will _save_ me money. Just gotta spread my legs for them every night.”

Jack frowned fiercely, “No! TJ, you are not a prostitute. And,” he tried to make a joke out of things, “the guy might be some greasy, dirty old guy with diseases?”

“At least I’ll have a roof over my head,” TJ snarked back, his tone holding an edge of bitterness.

“TJ, you can have the living room. We can move the TV into the kitchen,” Jack said, finally voicing what he’d been trying not to offer his brother.

“Yeah, we all know how much you want _that_ ,” TJ rolled his eyes again, backing out of the one ad and beginning to scroll through more. “I’ll be out of your hair in no time, Jack, don’t worry. We _did_ only find out about Bucky and his helper needing a place to stay last week. I’m trying, okay?” TJ reached for his drink on the table beside him, taking a long drink before putting it back on the coaster.

Jack sank down on the couch and pulled out his own phone to help the search. “I’d love to have you here, but until Bucky can function on his own, I need the space for him and his helper. I’m sorry, Teej.” He made a face and skipped over several ads. “What? Is Craigslist a sex site now?”

“I _know_ ,” TJ finally snapped, grabbing his laptop and moving off the couch, frustration and worry evident in his features as he left the living room. He almost screamed when he realized he had no place to go. His old room was occupied.

“I wish the Army had told us how Bucky was injured, at least . . . how bad it really is. He might not need a room. He might need a hospice.” Jack worried as he flipped open an ad. “ _Must be single and brunet. Must have great hips and a big ass._ What the hell?”

TJ barely managed to keep himself from slamming his laptop on the kitchen counter. He didn’t even reply to Jack’s voiced concerns, just continued to search through ad after ad. Finally his eyes caught on one that was in his desired neighborhood, close to his college campus, and didn’t seem like it was a hidden prostitution ad. _‘S20M seeks intelligent, musically inclined student cohabitant to share room and board during next three years. Must sign lease. Must pay half rent and utilities. Sexuality unimportant. Respond to . . .’_ the ad contained the actual address, not a phone number or email. In order to verify the place still was available, TJ would be forced to go check it out.

Scribbling down the address on a nearby piece of paper, TJ shut his laptop and called out to Jack as he grabbed his keys and phone, “going out to check out a place!”

Looking stunned, Jack hurried to catch up. “Teej! You shouldn’t go alone! What if it’s one of those killers or something that advertise on these things?”

“Then I still won’t be your problem anymore,” TJ snarked.

Jack reached out and grabbed TJ. “TJ! I’m not kicking you out because you’re a _problem_. I can make it work. I . . . maybe Bucky’s caregiver can live in his room for a bit?”

Pulling his arm from Jack’s hand, TJ said, “I already got my stuff all packed. Bucky and his little helper are arriving _tomorrow_ , Jack. Now, I need to go check someplace out before someone else gets it.”

“David and I can move out of the master and let Bucky and his helper live in there,” Jack offered. “We don’t need a lot of space for our bed and clothes.”

“Jesus, Jack,” TJ huffed, “just _stop_ , okay? Can I please go?”

Letting his little brother go, Jack frowned. “I worry about you, Teej,” he said.

“You’ve got enough to worry about. Don’t worry about me,” TJ said before turning to head towards the door.

“Visit! Often!” Jack ordered desperately.

“Haven’t even got the place, yet, Jack,” TJ called back in exasperation.

Huffing, Jack said, “you will. Everyone loves you.”

TJ’s back stiffened and he didn’t say anything for a few moments, “I’ll call if I’ll be later than dinner,” he said over his shoulder before slipping out of the small townhouse.

Once outside, TJ dug through his pockets, pulling out his pack of cigarettes and lighting one with a slightly shaking hand. Luckily, the apartment wasn’t too far away, within a twenty minute walk from Jack and his husband, David’s, townhouse. He took several drags while he walked. Jack didn’t know about him starting to smoke, and TJ planned to keep it that way. There were a lot of things Jack didn’t need to know.

When he made it to the address listed on the ad, TJ looked up at the apartment building before stepping inside and heading towards the fourth floor. He quickly noted a designated smoking area located on the ground floor. There was no elevator, so, TJ had to climb four flights of stairs until he reached his desired floor. Looking down at the paper he’d scribbled the address down on, TJ made it to the right door and brought his fist down to knock gently on the wood.

After only a moment, the door opened, on a chain lock. Someone inside dressed in dark green with black hair seemed to watch him for a long moment before shutting the door and unchaining it. The door swung wide and there was one of TJ’s college classmates, another Sophomore named Loki Odinson, standing there, dressed in green slacks and a matching green sweater. The air conditioning inside had the room rather chilly in the August heat. Loki’s long black hair had been tied back in a braid then pinned up on his head in a bun. He stepped out of the way and said, “TJ, right?”

Blinking, surprised to see the slightly awkward, quiet man he’d shared a few classes with last year, TJ nodded slowly as he took a step into the cold apartment, “yeah . . . and you’re Loki?”

“Yes,” he replied, his accented English sounding a bit old fashioned, a give away that English probably wasn’t his first language. “You’re here about the room share?” Loki closed the door behind TJ and turned towards the kitchen-livingroom combo and the full sized refrigerator tucked into a neat slot between sink and counter. The apartment was very clean and neat, with no personal touches or even pictures. The color was beige, the furniture standard.

Fingers tapping against his jeans, TJ looked around the plain space, licking his lips; he turned his eyes back to the tall, raven-haired man. “Yeah, I would’ve called . . .”

“But I deliberately left off my number,” Loki provided. He nodded. “There are two bedrooms and one bathing room.” He led TJ to the three doors, opening each. “If you stay, you may choose which bedroom you want. I haven’t unpacked yet.”

“Did you just get the place?” TJ asked, looking into the bathroom, done in pale greens.

“Yes,” Loki looked at TJ. “Two days ago. I can put fresh linen on the bed if you choose the room I’ve been using.” He didn’t indicate which room that might be; one bedroom was in soft blues the other in cream.

After looking in both bedrooms, TJ turned to face the taller man, having to look up slightly to meet his eyes. “Why did you ask for a musically inclined student?”

“A student will understand the need for study time,” Loki said, simply, “and if you are interested and studying music, I won’t have to put up with off-key singing or humming. You’ll be on-key.” Loki went back the the fridge. “If you want me to keep my hands off any specific foods or drinks, just mark them. I put masking tape and felt tips in the drawer closest the refrigerator.” He turned and offered a sealed bottle of water, holding one for himself. “And I won’t go in your room without knocking unless it sounds like you are in distress. If you choose to bring a lover home, merely hang something on the doorknob to indicate you wish privacy and the sounds are not distress.” Loki tilted his head slightly, ice-green eyes studying TJ. “And if you wish to do recreational substances, please keep illegal ones out of the apartment. There are periodic inspections by the landlord, I understand.”

Blinking, TJ took the water bottle and said, “don’t plan on doing anything illegal in the apartment.”

“Good,” Loki acknowledged in a neutral tone, “then you have less chance of being evicted by the landlord. You study music mainly, correct?”

“Yeah,” TJ nodded, taking a sip of his water before screwing the cap back on. “I want to be a composer for movies?”

Nodding, Loki advised, “don’t limit yourself to only movies. Plenty of recognition and work for television and even Broadway. I study archeology and anthropology, double major.”

“Sounds like a lot of work,” TJ commented.

Smiling, amusement dancing in his ice-green eyes, Loki chuckled, “especially for someone who isn’t interested in history? Yes, it is but I love trying to understand who came before us and what they lived like, why they did things.”

TJ nodded and looked around the space again.

“You may bring in as much as you think can fit safely. Decorate your room as you see fit within the regulations. I have a copy of the lease for you to look over and sign, if you’re interested.” Loki pulled open a drawer revealing paperwork only and a couple of capped pens. The man obviously had a very organized system.

“And, how soon can I move in . . . if all this works out?” TJ asked.

Loki handed over the lease and a pen, gesturing to a chair by a coffee table. There were no large dining room table and chairs since the space didn’t allow for it. “As soon as you sign the lease I can give you the second key and you can move in.”

“Really?” TJ’s brows rose in surprise as he sat down at the coffee table, glancing over the formal lease.

“I trust you will take care of paying your half of the rent and utilities?” Loki said, sinking down to the other chair and placing his bottle, still unopened, on a coaster on the glass surface of the coffee table. “I will expect your half by the first of next month. This month is already paid for so is a grace period, a sort of freebie, if you will.”

TJ couldn’t believe his luck, Loki may seem a bit _stiff_ and a little awkward but he didn’t strike TJ as a bad roommate. The apartment was only ten minutes from campus and the rent wasn’t outrageously expensive. Looking over the lease for a few minutes, TJ nodded, “I think I’ll take it?” He hoped there wasn’t a hidden expectation, but, TJ didn’t really have a choice. Bucky and his live-in helper were arriving tomorrow and TJ needed to be out by then.

“Then if you will sign and choose a room, I will give you the second set of keys. There is one for the front door, one for each bedroom, and one for the bathroom, in case someone is in distress.” Loki stood and went to the blue bedroom, opening the closet where he’d hung a few outfits, and rooted through a suitcase on the floor, still packed. He came out with the spare keys, all four a different color from one another: one yellow, one blue, one green, and one red.

TJ signed the contract and then looked up at Loki and then at the keys. After a moment, the thin brunet took the blue key with a small smile, “so, I can move in tonight?”

Loki smiled back, relief in his eyes. “You can move in whenever you want, and this entire ring is for you. I have the other set. The keys are color-coded, the red being the front door.” He tilted his head, “do you wish help moving in?”

“Oh,” TJ flushed and took the keys from Loki, putting them in his pocket, “no, thank you. I only have a few boxes.” He stood back up and said, “I should be back within a few hours?”

“I have a car,” Loki offered.

“You’re already helping me enough, Loki, you have no idea,” TJ said, heading towards the door.

Looking thoughtful, Loki said, “if I was unable to get a roommate by next month, I’d have to move in with my brother. He owns a physical therapy gym and insisted that I will have to spend my free time helping him if I live with him. He feels my studies are impractical.”

“Well,” TJ sighed softly, “at least you have a place to go?” He gave the taller man a fleeting smile.

“If I didn’t want a roommate so badly, I’d give you Thor’s address,” Loki joked.

TJ let out a soft huff, almost sounding like a laugh but not quite. He said, “I’ll be back in a few hours. Thanks again, Loki.”

Nodding, Loki fished another key from his own pocket, taking it off his own keyring. It was black. “This is for the door downstairs. I’ll get the other one from the landlord when I turn in the lease you signed. If you’re after nine, the door will be locked.”

“Oh, thanks,” TJ nodded, taking the key to add to the others.

Loki moved over to the drawer with the masking tape and pens and pulled out a long silver cylinder and a small tube. He headed for the door, carrying the lease and his cylinder and small tube. “I’ll be here when your return. If you want special food items, I can pick some up until you get your finances sorted?”

“Oh, no, you don’t have to do that,” TJ said, opening the door. He gave another wave to his new roommate.

Loki smiled and shut the door behind them, following TJ down the steps. TJ walked all the way down and out of the apartment building, Loki right behind him. Glancing over his shoulder as he distanced himself from the building, TJ frowned softly, as Loki turned and let himself in the small smoker’s area. Letting out a breath, not too surprised that Loki vaped, TJ nodded to himself and continued on his way back to his brother’s townhouse. He smoked another cigarette before making it back.

TJ opened the door without announcing to his older brother that he was back. He walked directly over to his boxes and suddenly wished he’d accepted Loki’s help. How was he going to get his stuff over? He didn’t have much, only four medium sized boxes and a suitcase of clothing . . . but, that’d be a lot of trips.

“Did I hear someone come in?” That voice belonged to the second Barnes brother, Jefferson, who owned a shop where he made and sold toys. He was considered a bit weird by all the neighbors, but he didn’t seem to care. Jefferson’s wife had left him for another man, leaving the man to raise a little girl on his own, and he seemed happier than he ever had without the woman in their lives. Though he lived in his own apartment down the street Jefferson often came over for weekends with his daughter, Grace. The older man looked around the door into the living room, his dark eyeliner and carefully arranged curls lending a slightly gothic look to him, despite the very colorful patterned vest he wore over his shirt. “Hey, Tommy. How’s it going?”

“Oh, you know, as good as I can be,” TJ murmured, not taking his eyes off the stack of boxes, trying to figure out how transporting all those things would work.

“Jack said you were looking at an apartment?” Jefferson walked in, hands in the pockets of his pin-striped dark grey trousers.

“Yup,” TJ answered, finally looking over at his brother, “just trying to figure out how to move my things.”

“Want me to help? I’ve got my car,” Jefferson offered, smiling lopsidedly. His pale blue eyes looked almost mysterious with the eyeliner.

“Don’t hafta,” TJ murmured, shaking his head. He ran his fingers through his wild curls, ruffling them up even more.

“Well, if I _had_ to, I’d kick and scream and throw a fit like Grace on a bad day. But since it’s not _required_ , I offer freely.” Jefferson pretended to take off a hat and bowed low over his arm.

Chewing his bottom lip, TJ looked at Jefferson, “I mean . . . you don’t mind?” After a moment, he asked, “where’s Jack? He was here?”

“Jack had to go get Bucky. He got a call that they came earlier than expected?” Jefferson scooped up one of the boxes. “Grace can sit in the back with a couple of boxes and the others will fit the trunk nicely.”

Letting out a breath,TJ tried to shove down any negative feelings about his brother’s arrival. It wasn’t Bucky’s fault that he got hurt and needed to be shipped back home. TJ felt like an awful brother, so selfish, but he couldn’t stop the bitterness he felt over being kicked out to make room for his other brother. Grabbing another box, TJ followed Jefferson out to his car to load up the boxes.

It didn’t take long before Jefferson had TJ’s stuff stashed in the sedan. He led his little brother into the house to look for his child. “Grace was in the kitchen doing something with marshmallows,” he said.

“How is she? Looking forward to school?” TJ asked, following his brother back into the home.

“Actually, yeah, she is,” Jefferson grinned widely. “She’s starting third grade this year, a year ahead of time. She feels very special.” He stopped in the kitchen, looking at his blonde haired daughter with the large brown eyes, marshmallows tangled in her hair and smeared all over her shirt. “Real special,” Jefferson laughed.

The kid looked up and grinned, moving like lightening towards TJ and her father. “Uncle Tommy!”

“Hey, kiddo,” TJ grinned, hugging his niece despite the sticky mess covering her. “Did you eat the marshmallows or try to do your hair with them?”

“I was eating them and they got stuck,” she laughed, as happy as her father always seemed.

Jefferson shook his head. “Gonna have to clean you up when we get back, but right now, I think a hat and apron to cover the mess so you don’t get it all over the car while we help Tommy move to his new apartment.” Jefferson began retrieving the items mentioned.

Grace turned wide, awed eyes up at her uncle. “Wow! You’re finally grown up enough to move out?”

Forcing a smile on his face, TJ nodded, “yup, all grown up now.”

“And you’re gonna go to the adult school still?” she asked, but her head snapped around when they heard the front door slam open.

Jack’s voice called out, “someone get the door to TJ’s room? C’mon, Bucky, just a little further.”

Blinking, not having expected Bucky and Jack to be back yet, TJ hurried to his old room and opened the door for them.

Jack and the tall blond stranger dressed in Army uniform helped actually carry Bucky into the house and down the hall. Bucky was dressed in a very loose pair of shorts but no shirt, bandages, slightly stained with blood and such, wrapped around his entire left torso and thigh, all the way to his neck. His left arm was missing completely. Bucky seemed drugged and rather out of it, though his eyes kept opening. Glancing over, Jack sounded relieved, “oh, good, Teej, get the coves? Remove them completely? He needs straight linen only until his wounds start healing better. He’s got burns. They really should have kept him in the hospital longer!”

TJ wasn’t even able to process Bucky’s injuries all the way before rushing to do what Jack ordered, removing the covers and stripping the bed to just the sheet for his brother. His pale eyes were wide as he watched Jack and the blond stranger carry Bucky into the room.

Helping the blond get Bucky in the bed, then turning to run out and get the IV set up so they could start Bucky back on the fluids, Jack didn’t say anything else until he’d given the equipment over to the caregiver. “Teej?” Jack glanced over, “this is Captain Rogers. He’s an Army nurse. They . . . Teej . ..” Jack gulped and forced the words out, “they sent Bucky home to die. They want him on morphine until he . . . passes.”

“Wait, what?” TJ went pale and his eyes widened even more, looking at his brother in the bed before snapping his attention back to Jack.

“You can have the other room. Captain Rogers will be staying in here until . . . that happens.” Jack rubbed his hand over his face.

“I don’t want the fucking room,” TJ snapped, shaking his head and turning out of the room, unable to look at his brother so hurt.

Jefferson hadn’t come near the sickroom, holding his daughter against him, both watching, standing by the kitchen door. Softly, he asked, “Tommy? Wanna get some air, show us your new place?” Jefferson had never done well in a sickroom and tended to avoid them if possible.

TJ didn’t even respond to Jefferson, storming out of the home and slamming the front door behind him with a forceful pull. He made it to the sidewalk and began pacing, trembling hands pushing into his pockets as he pull out another cigarette. He lit it and took in a drag before starting to walk, not even sure where exactly he was heading.

Jefferson didn’t even stop him, letting TJ walk his troubles into submission.

**************

Loki opened the door, frowning softly at the sight of the drunk TJ trying to fit the black key in their apartment door. He sighed and reached out to guide TJ in, shutting the door behind them. Without a word for the inebriated state of his new roommate, Loki guided the man directly to the bathroom, slipping the keys from TJ’s hand to the counter as he passed. He supported the other man’s weight as he reached in to start the shower.

TJ let out a giggle, having to lean heavily on his roommate, the smell of heavy liquor coming off him in waves. “Gotta fix the door, Lucky . . . key don’t work . . .”

“Yes,” Loki said with a disapproving tone, though soft, “I shall. You need bathing, TJ. You’ve spilled on your clothing.”

“Nope,” TJ reported with a sloppy grin, eyes dazed and cheeks flushed, “I didn’t spill. The hot guy at the club spilled _all_ over me.”

“If you didn’t spill, did you urinate on yourself?” Loki asked, wrinkling his nose at the mix of odors.

“I didn’t _piss_ myself,” TJ sounded offended, turning to look at Loki though the movement made him stumble and giggle again.

“Did the _hot guy_ piss on you?” Loki asked with a sigh. He began stripping his roommate.

“Not one of my kinks, Lucky,” TJ slurred, not fighting as the practical stranger began undressing him. “Tie me up, all for _that_. Don’t let . . . people _piss_ on me. That’s disgusting.”

“Very unhygienic,” Loki agreed. He paused then looked at TJ, his soaked shirt unfastened and half off, “did you just tell me to tie you up?”

Grinning, TJ said, “do you _want_ to tie me up? You can . . . I’m good,” the slim brunet tried taking off his own shirt, stumbling to the side and nearly falling before managing to catch himself and remove his shirt.

Loki sighed and stepped over to begin helping TJ once more, unbuckling the other man’s jeans. “If you stay still a moment, I can get you undressed, TJ.”

“I _am_ ,” TJ giggled, swaying once more.

Nodding, Loki placed his hands firmly on TJs shoulders and pushed him to sit on the edge of the tub. Kneeling down, Loki unfastened TJ’s jeans and began shimmying the wet denim off the lean man, his hands having to peel the material off TJ’s flesh.

TJ laughed again, but didn’t stop Loki from removing his clothes, the tight jeans even harder to get off the brunet’s long legs.

Noting the burgeoning erection, Loki sighed, his breath inadvertently ghosting over TJ’s member. “That won’t make this any easier.” He paused then carefully reached over to shift TJ’s cock so that he could slide the jeans over his front without catching.

Letting out a soft groan as Loki touched his erection, TJ’s hips inadvertently canted up, making the very drunk man lose his precarious balance and fall into the tub under the spray of water. He blinked, momentarily confused as to what had happened before letting out another giggle, “wanna join me? Water’s fine . . .”

Loki shook his head, inadvertently smiling by then. “TJ, you are going to drown yourself before we ever get you nude.” He reached down to finally pull the jeans from TJ’s legs, slipping off the other man’s shoes in the process. He blinked ice-green eyes as he found himself very close to TJ’s abdomen. With a small murmur, Loki leaned over and traced a very gentle kiss across the exposed flesh of the man he’d often watched during freshman year.

Groaning, TJ’s head fell back again, “didn’t . . . didn’t know you liked guys, Lucky . . .” his cock twitched under the soaked fabric of his boxer-briefs.

“Who else should I like?” Loki breathed against TJ’s flesh. He lifted his eyes. “You are drunk. I am hardly your typical lover, TJ.” He worked TJ’s socks off.

“How would you know?” TJ slurred, voice a sloppy challenge, “you see the guys I sleep with? You weren’t there . . .” The drunk man tried to remove his briefs, struggling with the fabric as it caught on his full erection.

“You tend towards well dressed, popular, frat boys,” Loki said, but he was smiling softly. Reaching up to help TJ remove his wet briefs, Loki’s hand caressed briefly over the hard shaft.

“Not uh,” TJ breathed out, hips canting into that touch again, “I like all guys. Any shape and size. I’m not picky, Lucky. Tall guys, short guys, skinny guys, muscular guys . . .” The brunet grinned, cheeks flushing even more under the warm water. “You’re a guy . . . so, I like you, too.”

“So, as long as I have a penis and testes, you want me?” Loki asked softy. He tossed the wet underwear over to the heap of clothing, his own sweater and slacks thoroughly soaked by then.

“I’m not picky,” TJ slurred, rolling on his side clumsily to try and stand up in the shower, but he slipped and fell to the tub floor, splashing water everywhere and knocking Loki’s bathing supplies down.

“And if I’m clean and not . . . unattractive . . . does that make me even _more_ desirable, TJ?” Loki took off his sweater, letting it drop onto TJ’s clothing, revealing a slender, pale frame with a fencer’s musculature. He picked up the bottles and let them drop just outside the tub.

Glancing over, trying to stand again, TJ pushed the hair that had fallen damply away from his eyes. He grinned at Loki and said, “you’re the most ‘sireable guy around, Lucky.” He finally made it back to his feet, swaying as the room seemed to spin.

“I am,” Loki sounded very amused by then, having made his personal choice, “the only _guy_ around.” He unfastened his expensive slacks and slipped out of the destroyed clothing, tossing it out of the tub. He slipped off his silk boxers, revealing a long, slender uncircumcized cock already filling with interest. “Do you wish to make love in the tub or in the bed, darling?” he purred.

Blinking dazed eyes, TJ’s gaze trailed down Loki’s form. He had one hand on the wet tiled wall of the shower to support himself. “Where you like to?” He asked with a crooked grin.

Realizing that TJ wasn’t the kind fond of making his own decisions, loving the jolt of power he felt being put in control, Loki climbed to his feet and pulled TJ up. “Against the shower wall for now, TJ,” he purred, reaching down to stroke over TJ’s cock then back towards his balls.

Mewling, TJ fell back against the wall, movements still clumsy. His hips canted up and he groaned, “feel . . . feels good . . .” the only thing that still smelled of alcohol was his breath.

Leaning up against TJ, cock sliding against the other man’s member, Loki whispered in his ear, “are you a bottom or a top, TJ?” He reached around, stroking at TJ’s entrance.

“Bottom . . .” TJ managed to answer with a needy keen, thankful to be pushed up against the wall at the moment. He mewled loudly as he felt Loki’s fingers caress over his entrance. His cock was full and aching, already dripping precum.

Loki nipped at TJ’s neck then right behind his ear, letting his other hand trail down to caress over TJ’s cock, still fingering his ass. Carefully, Loki began pushing a finger into TJ’s passage, twisting around a bit to begin stretching him.

Sucking in a breath, letting his head fall to the side at the pleasurable burn of Loki opening him up, TJ whimpered and keened.

Smiling against TJ’s neck, behind his ear, Loki continued to work TJ open, switching hands so that he used TJ’s precum to aid in opening him up. “You want me to fill you, TJ? Want me to pump inside you?”

“Yes, yes,” TJ moaned, nodding his head in approval of Loki’s words. He thrust his cock into Loki’s hand, seeking that friction.

Whispering, Loki said, “will you hate me in the morning?” He carefully added a second finger, using only the precum to open his soon-to-be lover.

TJ shook his head, rolling his hips back to push Loki’s fingers deeper, “not uh . . . not gonna hate . . .”

“And if I get you pregnant?” Loki whispered, teasingly. He reached over and shut off the water after letting go of TJ’s cock.

Pouting at the loss of contact on his aching cock, TJ looked up at Loki, “even then . . . you’d be my baby daddy . . . you’d hafta support me and the baby . . .”

Loki chuckled. “I can manage that,” he promised, guiding TJ from the shower onto the no-slip mat. He began drying off his roommate, slipping his fingers from TJ’s ass. “Gotta get dry, my dear. You’ll freeze. Need lubricant.” He used the towel to caress and rub TJ.

Keening, TJ panted softly under the drying caresses, “can jus’ use lotion or somethin’ . . .”

Loki chuckled and used a towel to quickly swipe at most of his own body, still supporting TJ, kissing him as often as he could by then, lips questing over TJ’s shoulders and neck. He finally reached into a bathroom drawer, pulled a few items out with one hand, and guided TJ down the hall to the cream colored bedroom. Kissing TJ, he backed the unsteady man into the room and let him fall onto the bed. Loki crawled on the bed, over top TJ, still trying to kiss him. He dropped the items next to them and began fumbling a bottle of lube open to coat his fingers, finally caressing over TJ’s entrance and sliding two slick fingers inside, the other hand once more gripping and massaging TJ’s shaft.

Moaning low, TJ’s back arched off the bed slightly, his legs falling open a little wider. He whimpered and keened as Loki massaged his cock. “You done this before, Lucky?” TJ panted, dazed eyes moving to look up at his lover.

“No, but I am very observant when watching . . . videos,” he murmured against TJ’s throat. Feeling the loosing of TJ’s passage, he carefully slid a third finger in, circling and flexing to stretch TJ open wider.

Groaning, TJ begged, “please, jus’ fuck me . . . please . . . open enough . . .” the brunet’s skin was flushed with arousal and the lingering effects of the alcohol. When Loki kissed TJ’s lips, he could taste the alcohol, the fruity juices his drink must’ve been mixed with.

Loki sat up on his feet, knees on either side of TJ’s hips. He reached for one of the objects next to him and pulled out a condom, unwrapping it and rolling it on carefully. Once he was sheathed, he took a slow breath and carefully lined up, holding his own cock steady. “Tell me if this is wrong, my dear,” he purred out, a slight nervous undertone to his voice. Loki began to slowly try to slip inside, stretching TJ with his cockhead.

Mewling, TJ moved with the initial thrust, rolling his hips to help Loki impale himself in his tight heat. Looking up at Loki, TJ gave the other man a blissed, crooked grin, “doin’ right so far . . .”

Loki’s eyes opened wide as he bottomed out, drawing in a shaking breath of sheer pleasure. “So . . . so tight . . . all around . . . TJ . . .” Loki sounded enthralled, his voice a low moan. "One . . . TJ . . ." Loki crashed his lips against TJ’s with a mewl, hips stuttering a bit before he began to stroke, holding himself so he wouldn’t slip out completely in his inexperience.

TJ didn’t seem to care about Loki’s inexperience; he moaned and whimpered and keened his pleasure. He rolled his hips to meet his lover’s thrusts, pushing Loki in that much deeper. His cock throbbed and leaked a steady amount of precum on his abdomen. “Feel good . . . feel so good . . .”

Kissing almost desperately, murmuring incoherently in his native tongue, Loki soon let go of himself as he gained a rhythm, stroking deep and slow, building in speed. He nipped slightly. Opening his lust blown eyes, ice-green overshadowed by pure black, Loki murmured something that sounded like _Ast_ among the other words, as well as _Tomas_.

Groaning at the increased pace, TJ knew he was getting close to release, feeling that warmth low in his gut. “Getting . . . gonna . . .”

Loki moaned almost in time with TJ’s stuttered words, “gonna . . .” he agreed, his voice tensing as his balls tightened and cock swelled a bit in preparation of release. Cumming, hard, into the condom, Loki buried his face in TJ’s neck and let out a very soft whimper, holding still, grasping TJ’s hips as if he was afraid he’d spin out of control if he didn’t hold on. He stroked, in a stuttering break of rhythm, a couple more times, TJ’s cock trapped and rubbing between their bodies.

Keening, TJ’s cock twitched and painted their abdomens in thick, white cum. He went still for a moment, looking completely blissed and happy. After catching his breath, TJ let out a contented purr and smiled at Loki, “that was . . . fun . . .”

Loki lifted his face, looking a bit shocked as well as blissed. Slowly, he whispered, “fun?” Backing up enough to sit on his feet, Loki gripped the condom carefully and pulled free of TJ’s passage, pulling off the condom, tying it, and tossing it into the nearby trash. He slid from the bed on shaky legs to go get something to clean them both up with, hoping TJ wouldn’t roll over while he was gone.

“Ya know? A good time?” TJ asked, propping himself up on his elbows.

Walking back in as he cleaned himself, Loki slid onto the bed and used a fresh cloth to clean up TJ. “Yes, it was . . . very good.” He kept his eyes on what he did, no sign of his emotions as he worked gently to clean his lover.

Blinking slowly, TJ tilted his head slightly as he watched Loki work, “not good for you, though?” He tried to get his alcohol riddled brain to work properly.

Loki lifted lust blown eyes to meet TJ’s. “It was . . . . the best I’ve ever had,” he said slowly, honestly.

Grinning crookedly, TJ said, “it was the only you’ve ever had.” It would settle in later that this had actually been Loki’s _first_ time having sex. “We can do it again sometime . . . if you want?”

“I’d like that,” Loki said, softly, tossing both cloths into the hamper nearby. He stretched out beside TJ and pulled a blanket over them to fight the chill of the air conditioner, still on high. Hesitating very briefly, Loki slid his hand over TJ’s abdomen then wrapped his arm around the other man and pulled him close, spooning with him. “I would very much like that, TJ.”

“Yeah, great way to relieve stress,” TJ commented softly, settling down on the soft mattress.

“Sleep, darling. Rest,” Loki murmured, kissing TJ at the nape of the neck. The over-critical, intelligent man snuggled down closer and sighed, accepting that this was probably all he’d ever get of the popular, beautiful TJ Barnes, most desirable guy on campus.


	2. Facing a New Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **WARNINGS: Medical Injuries, Hangover**

A knock sounded on the front door of TJ and Loki’s apartment near breakfast time the next morning.

Blinking awake, immediately groaning as a headache pounded fiercely when the light pierced his eyes, TJ rasped to his roommate, “expectin’ company?”

“Not this morning,” Loki replied and pulled himself from the bed, totally nude. He walked into the kitchen and came back with a bottle of water for TJ then headed into the blue bedroom to get his bathrobe, letting the unexpected visitor knock the entire time. Finally, belting his silk robe around him, Loki looked through the peephole then opened the door, which neither had bolted or chained the night before.

Jack’s voice sounded down the hall, “I’m looking for my brother, Thomas. He had this address on some paper? He was looking for an apartment yesterday but never came home last night.”

Loki studied Jack for a moment before asking, “and who are you, please?”

“Uh,” Jack sounded surprised. “His brother, Jack.”

“Wait here, please,” Loki intoned and turned to go into the cream bedroom. “TJ, Jack is here to find you. What should I tell him?”

Jack frowned, having followed Loki to the bedroom; he noted the disorder of the bed, smelled the sex in the air, and spotted the lube and box of condoms pushed onto the floor while the couple had slept.

Blinking, hair sticking wildly in every direction and looking absolutely miserable as he sipped at his water, TJ looked up at his brother. Jack could tell his baby brother was nude under the blankets that pooled low on his hips. “Jack?” TJ asked, voice low and rough with sleep and being so hungover.

“What the hell, Teej? I thought you said this was a clean arrangement, not prostitution!” He glared at Loki and pushed past the slender raven-haired man, heading for the bed. “I’m getting you out of this!”

“What?” TJ shook his head, glaring up at his older brother, “what the fuck are you talking about?”

“This arrangement for an apartment,” Jack growled, shooting a dirty look at Loki. “You said it was an apartment not a sex arrangement! You don’t have to live like this, sell yourself. Come on,” he reached for TJ and tried to pull his brother from the bed.

TJ stumbled and his head spun as Jack tugged his nude body from the bed. He groaned low, feeling nauseous as his skin paled a few shades.

Loki stepped in and forced Jack to let go of TJ, gripping Jack’s wrists so hard the older man’s hands went numb, and Jack gasped in shock and some pain. “Unhand him, Jack. He’s a grown man. He’ll decide to leave or stay. You are trespassing. I never invited you into my bedroom. Leave or I call the police.” Loki’s voice remained calm the entire time.

Jack whirled on Loki, trying to shake the numbness out of his hands and wrists. “What the hell! TJ, he’s assaulted me! C’mon, let’s get out of here!” He looked down to his brother.

TJ was on all fours, trying desperately not to throw up all over Loki’s floor. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to will away the pounding pain in his skull.

Loki ignored Jack and knelt down, wrapping his arms around TJ and murmuring softly. He helped TJ to stand and guided him into the darkened bathroom, sitting him on the cold tile floor by the toilet. Loki came back out and blocked Jack from the bathroom. “You will leave now, Jack. Call the police if you wish to report me, but you will leave or I will have you arrested.”

Stunned, Jack couldn’t understand what had happened or why but he hurried out to the hall, fumbling to try to get to his phone, try to make his hands work. He didn’t leave the hall outside the apartment as he glared at Loki, who shut the door and locked it before going back to retrieve TJ’s water.

Loki walked into the bathroom, leaving the light off but allowing some light in from the hallway. He knelt down and held the bottle to TJ’s lips, murmuring, “drink.”

Groaning softly, TJ accepted the water and slowly sipped at it, “so,” he rasped, meeting Loki’s eyes, “on a scale of one to ten, how much of an idiot was I last night?”

“Depends on which number means what,” Loki said, still keeping his tone soft. “You were . . . very friendly.”

Groaning softly, TJ let his head fall back against the sink behind him, “I’m sorry . . . uh . . . did we,” he flushed and chewed his bottom lip.

“Sorry,” Loki said softly then sighed and nodded. “Of course. Not very memorable when you’re . . . not mentally sound. There’s no blood. Are you feeling sore?”

“Feels like my head got ran over by a train,” TJ commented, sipping a little at his water. “But I’m not sore . . . down there, if that’s what you’re asking. I’m really sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable. I can get . . . needy when I drink . . .”

“Uncomfortable?” Loki studied TJ in the dimness. “No, I felt no such thing, TJ. I enjoyed what we did. However, I understand that you are a free spirit with interests in finding a lover you wish to commit to. I will not expect any repeats of our . . . actions unless you wish it. I won’t press you.” He didn’t comment about TJ’s drunken status from the night before.

Nodding slowly, TJ took another drink of his water and said, “well, thank you, Loki. I hope . . . I hope we can still be roommates?”

“Does the fact that we were lovers for a night make you uncomfortable, TJ?” Loki asked.

“What? No,” TJ answered; he let out a soft sigh and said, “I was just offering?”

“I appreciate that. However, I never asked you to stop nor to leave. Also, I believe I can control myself so you don’t feel pressured. Right now, I hear sirens. Your brother may have called the police. What should I tell them?” Loki sounded so calm, even in the face of Jack’s wrath.

Sighing heavily, TJ slowly stood up and said, “I’ll go talk to him . . . do you have some pants or something I can borrow?” He flushed brightly, rubbing the back of his neck as he offered Loki a sheepish smile.

“We’re of a size,” Loki said and stood, slipping out of the green silk robe and offering it. “You may wear this until I can find you clothes?” Loki’s body was nude, pale, and slim.

Taking the robe with a grateful smile, TJ’s eyes trailed down Loki’s body again, noting the very clean and neatly shaved man as he pulled on the covering. He tied it shut and then slowly made his way to the front door. He opened it, wincing in the light due to his headache.

Jack stood there, still trying to dial his phone, looking desperate. Apparently, the sirens hadn’t been for them after all. Jack looked up, relief in his pale eyes. “God, TJ! C’mon. Let’s get you home!”

“Home? To sleep on the couch? Watch Bucky die?” TJ asked softly, leaning against the doorframe. His skin was pale and there were dark circles under the smaller brunet’s eyes.

Paling, Jack whispered, “you won’t even come see Bucky? You’d rather prostitute yourself for an apartment?”

Swallowing thickly, TJ lowered his eyes, “I’m not _prostituting_ myself for an apartment, Jack.”

“And having sex the first night with your landlord is what?” Jack whispered, glancing towards the door, where he could see Loki, still naked, making coffee. “My God, he’s a freak! Doesn’t he wear clothes?”

Glancing over his shoulder, TJ smiled softly at he looked at Loki and then back to Jack, “he’s a little . . . quirky. But, he’s not a freak. I’ve known him since last year . . . we had a few classes together.”

“And you think this guy’s safe? Not gonna demand more sex from you? He’s already gotten you once, TJ. He’s gonna think you owe him.” Jack shook his head, voice a low warning, trying not to attract the raven-haired man’s attention. “And he might not even be _clean_!”

“What does it matter?” TJ murmured, running a hand down his exhausted features, “what does it matter to you, anyway, Jack?”

Shock crossed Jack’s features and he harshly whispered, “because you’re my baby brother! I care about what happens to you!”

“And giving me a week to find a new place? What was that?” TJ snapped back, keeping his tone just as low.

“I told you, you can stay, we’ll work it out!” Jack ran a hand over his hair, shaking his head. “My God, TJ, such a drama queen! Captain Rogers doesn’t need your room. He’ll be staying in Bucky’s.”

“Drama queen? Right,” TJ nodded slowly, clucking his tongue in anger, “because me doing _everything_ you or Momma or Papa or Bucky or Jefferson ever asked of me is being dramatic?”

“Where is this coming from?” Jack sounded exasperated. “You’ve never rebelled this hard before! My, God, TJ, you’re a grown man. Can’t you handle a bit of change?”

“Then start treating me like it!” TJ shouted, throwing his hands in the air.

“Breakfast, darling?” Loki’s voice came out, sounding high class with his odd accent. The smell of coffee came to them, laced with vanilla.”

Jack looked over and frowned. “C’mon. We’ll finish this talk at home. He should at least have the decency to dress with guests around.”

Swallowing thickly, TJ looked back at Loki and then at Jack, “like you said, Jack, I’m a _grown_ man, right? So, if I want to stay at the apartment _I_ found because _you_ asked me to. Then, I’m going to stay here.”

Jack’s mouth dropped open.

Loki walked over, handing a cup of steaming vanilla coffee to TJ. “Vanilla fine, my dear?” he asked, watching Jack, making no attempt to cover his fine body.

“Vanilla is perfect, thank you,” TJ said, keeping his eyes on his eldest brother, “bye, Jack. I’ll be over to see Bucky.”

Loki reached out and guided TJ into the apartment with a hand under his arm. He then said, “farewell, Jack.” Shutting the door, Loki locked and chained the door then guided TJ into the dim lit kitchen area of the main room. He’d actually left all but the main hall lights off in deference to TJ’s hangover. “Would you like some toast?”

“Yes, please?” TJ sighed, looking down at the cup in his hands, guilt already beginning to cramp his already nauseous stomach. He’d never talked to Jack like that before . . . he should probably go after his brother.

Loki turned and began toasting bread. Softly he said, “have I offended you by doing this? Not dressing? Contesting your brother?”

“No, it’s fine. It’s your apartment . . . don’t feel like you have to dress or whatever . . .” TJ murmured softly.

“ _Our_ apartment, TJ, unless you wish to leave.” Loki turned and watched the other man. “Butter? Marmalade? Plain?” His entire pale body looked cold in the air conditioned rooms.

“I - - I should go after him . . .” TJ murmured, looking towards the front door, “never . . .”

“Butter, marmalade, or plain?” Loki repeated watching TJ.

“Plain?” TJ chewed at his bottom lip, turning his head to look at Loki again.

Handing over the plate of toasted bread, Loki stroked a hand lightly over TJ’s shoulder. “I’ll find you clothing so you may visit your Bucky.” He walked to the blue bedroom.

“He’s dying,” TJ whimpered, softly, almost to himself.

Loki instantly came back, carrying several different pairs of clean underwear. He put them on the table and wrapped his arms around TJ, turning the other man so his face was buried in Loki’s abdomen. He stroked the soft brown curls. “I know, darling,” he said gently, having gained that much from the argument he’d overheard.

“I’m a horrible brother,” TJ said, voice muffled as he kept his face buried in Loki’s abdomen.

Stroking TJ’s hair, Loki let his other hand spread out firmly on TJ’s back, a sturdy support. “You are afraid and overwhelmed. You are not horrible for feeling, darling.”

“I gotta go see him . . . don’t know how long . . .” TJ tried to take a few deep breaths, breathing in Loki’s natural scent. “Gotta see Bucky . . .”

“We’ll go. We need to dress, my darling.” Loki stroked once more then moved his hand around to slip under TJ’s chin, lifting the other man’s face. He offered a serious look, no false smiles. “We’ll drive over there and get there within the half hour, TJ.”

Nodding, TJ took another breath, steadying himself, before he started getting dressed in a pair of undies that Loki had brought out. Luckily, they were about the same size, except that Loki was a couple inches taller.

Loki slid into a pair then went back for more clothes, eventually providing TJ an entire outfit, piece by piece, right down to the shoes. He then ran a comb carefully through TJ’s hair, instructing him, “eat a bit of toast so you don’t get sick. It will soak up the extra in your stomach, my dear.”

TJ obeyed and ate at his toast for a few minutes, finishing about half a piece before he asked, “can . . . can I go see Bucky now?”

“We’re going right now, darling,” Loki confirmed and helped TJ to stand, offering him the keys that were put on the counter the night before. He wrapped a supportive arm around TJ’s waist and guided him out and down the steps to his beat up old two-seater car. Opening the door, Loki aided TJ into the car, softly instructing, “put on your seatbelt.” He got into the driver’s seat, belted up, and started the car, which actually sounded like it worked so much better than it looked. “If you will provide your address, TJ, we will go see Bucky now.”

**************

Letting out a breath as Loki pulled up in front of the townhouse, TJ said, “thanks for the ride, Loki . . .”

“Any time, TJ,” Loki replied and got out of the car. He helped TJ out then turned to eye the house. “A very nice home.”

“Yeah,” TJ said softly and then looked back at Loki again, “are you coming inside?” The slightly smaller man looked surprised.

“Unless you do not wish me to,” Loki responded. “I can stay with the car if you prefer, but thought you might want a friend for moral support.”

“I don’t know if Jack is going to want you inside,” TJ answered honestly, chewing his bottom lip.

Nodding, Loki offered a supportive smile. “Then I shall wait here. If you need or want me, I will be here.” He leaned against the car and continued to watch TJ. “You can do this, TJ. Ignore Jack. Concentrate on Bucky.”

Nodding, TJ took a breath and walked up to the front door. He knocked and then waited for someone to answer.

The door opened and Jefferson looked surprised. “TJ! You don’t have to knock! C’mon in!” He looked beyond his brother and checked over Loki. “Cute boyfriend,” he said.

“Not my boyfriend, new roommate,” TJ answered, stepping into the home.

Nodding, Jefferson asked, “want me to load your stuff into his car instead?” He turned to follow TJ in.

“Oh,” TJ nodded and said, “yeah . . .” he looked around and his fingers thrummed nervously against his thighs.

“Jack’s in the kitchen. Bucky’s in his room with Steve, his helper. Grace is in the kitchen, hopefully avoiding more marshmallows,” Jefferson said quietly, offering a smile.

Nodding, TJ skipped past the kitchen for the moment, wanting to see Bucky first before attempting to talk with Jack again. He walked to his old room he used to share with Bucky and softly rapped his knuckles against the wood before opening it and stepping inside.

The large, blond nurse smiled gently at TJ as he entered the room, “hello, TJ. Bucky talked about you a lot.” Steve stepped back after checking on Bucky’s bandages and IV.

Bucky blinked open his eyes and offered a drug-happy smile, looking comfortable. “Heya, baby. Welcome back. You’re fight with Jack over?”

“Uh . . .” TJ looked at Steve and then back at Bucky as he took a step closer to the bed, “not quite . . . but, I wanted to see you first.”

“See, Stevie,” he murmured happily, “I’m important. TJ loves me.” He grinned and waved his right hand. “Sit, baby. Meet Stevie. He’s a nurse.”

TJ took another step closer, not moving to sit yet; he let his eyes trail down his brother’s injured body. “You . . . sound okay?” TJ said softly. Bucky didn’t sound like a guy who was literally just sent home to die; he sounded okay . . . drugged but definitely not dying.

“Hurts a lot, but should be able to start therapy with an arm soon,” Bucky smiled. “Steve’s got it arranged. VA’s outta beds so sent me home for care.” He studied his brother. “Like that shirt, Teej. Maroon’s good on you.”

“Thanks, Bucky,” TJ gave his brother a small smile and then said, “so . . . you’re okay? Not . . . dying?”

“Nope,” Bucky smiled and blinked at TJ. “Shoulda died. I’m a freakin’ miracle, baby. No arm, though. Gonna haveta learn to write and unzip and everything, all over again.” He pouted. “But Stevie’s gonna help me. He’s my nurse.”

“Sounds like he’s a good guy,” TJ said, tossing a smirk at Steve who flushed and smiled in return. TJ felt relief flood through his body as he heard that Bucky wasn’t dying. Seriously injured, but he wasn’t about to die.

“You goin’ ta college still, baby? Still studying piano?” Bucky patted the bed with his right hand then held it out to Steve.

Laughing softly, Steve moved over to hold Bucky’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“He’s my nurse, baby,” Bucky said happily, looking at Steve.

“TJ’s not your nurse,” Steve teased with a cheeky grin, leaning down to kiss Bucky’s fingers gently.

“Baby _is_ TJ, Stevie. ‘S his name.” He blinked slowly, watching Steve as if the world revolved around the former Captain.

“Oh?” Steve laughed and gave TJ a quick wink, “Why do you call him, baby, Buck?”

“Cause he’s the youngest outta the five o’ us, Stevie. Right, Baby?” Bucky looked at TJ, holding Steve’s hand happily.

Laughing softly, TJ nodded, “yeah, youngest of five. Even Becca, my twin, was born five minutes before me. And she acts like she’s the oldest out of all of us.”

“Where’s Becca, Baby? In school?” Bucky shifted against the bed and whimpered at the jolt of pain down his left. “Stupid IED!” he cursed softly, the next words the rudest TJ had ever heard from his middle brother.

TJ’s eyes widened and he said, “do you want me to let you rest, Buck?”

“Steve, help me up? Gotta sit up . . . please?” Bucky asked, knowing Steve would understand that Bucky wanted to use the urinal and not spill. He looked at TJ. “Gotta . . . do something secret,” he grinned.

Understanding, TJ nodded and gave Bucky a smile before slipping out of the room. He headed for the kitchen where he found Jack. He didn’t say anything for several long moments.

Jack was very gentle with Grace, treating her like someone far more delicate than the hearty seven year old she was.

“So,” TJ called out softly, “Bucky _isn’t_ dying.”

Jack’s head shot up and he frowned. “Where’d you come up with that? The VA doctor said he should be dead. We’re just waiting now.” Jack sounded miserable.

“But he’s not. Did you actually talk with his nurse? Or even Bucky?” TJ asked, watching Jack closely.

“Bucky was sleeping, and Captain Rogers was busy settling them both in. I haven’t gotten to talk to the Captain yet today. Grace and I are making him breakfast.” Jack straightened, not seeing Grace roll her eyes at the coddling her uncle put her through when her father let her work with all kinds of sharp things.

“Well, I just came from Bucky’s room. He’s pretty lucid and says he’s not dying and should be able to start therapy soon,” TJ reported with a frown, watching Jack closely.

Jack’s hands trembled as he tried to cut some fruit while Grace had been entrusted with pouring juice and milk. “Bucky’s also strung out on heavy morphine, TJ. No, Gracie, don’t touch the coffee. It’s hot. Okay? Hot.”

“She’s seven, Jack, not two,” TJ said, finally stepping into the kitchen to ease the knife from his older brother’s hands.

Now that TJ wasn’t as hungover or fighting with Jack, he could see the circles and streaks and bloodshot eyes from Jack having cried a good portion of the night. If his husband David could come back from his business trip, it would help Jack’s stress a lot.

“Gracie,” TJ smiled to his niece, “can you give Captain Rogers some coffee and then go hang out with your Papa?”

“Sure can, Uncle Tommy!” She declared, happily taking the coffee mug and very carefully carrying it from the room. Jack’s mouth opened in protest.

“How long has it been since you slept?” TJ asked, cutting the fruit. He didn’t look at Jack, focusing on his job for the moment.

“I think about . . . this is the second day? I never sleep when David’s traveling. Always worried I’ll get a call he crashed or something.” Jack ran his trembling hands through his hair.

“Go rest,” TJ ordered, voice suddenly firm as if he were the older brother, not Jack, “David’s due back in a few hours. Get a nap.”

“Can’t. It won’t come. I lie there just dreading the phone ringing.” Jack sighed and reached for the coffee.

“Sometimes just resting helps,” TJ commented; he looked over and said, “no coffee. You need sleep. Bucky’s fine. The weather is fine, so the plane is less likely to crash. David will get here before lunch time. Go _rest_.”

Jack froze, coffee halfway to his mouth. “But . . .” he protested.

Turning, TJ forced the mug from Jack’s hands and ordered again, “sleep, Jack. I’ll make sure David wakes you up.”

“Promise,” he whispered, seeming so less in control than he ever did. He’d obviously been hiding his weaker emotions from TJ all these years.

Sighing softly, TJ set the mug down on the counter and took Jack’s hand in his own, leading his older brother up the stairs into the master bedroom. He walked Jack to the bed and said, “promise. You’ll close your eyes and the next person you see will be David.” He sat Jack down and began removing his oldest brother’s shoes and socks.

Jack shuddered but let TJ undress him. Softly he asked, “you coming home, Teej? You . . . you can have Becca’s room if you want? If you don’t want Jefferson’s?”

“I really wish we would have figured this out before I signed that contract with Loki,” TJ sighed heavily, knowing his family needed him . . . but, so did Loki. His roommate wouldn’t be able to pay the lease without TJ’s half.

“We can break the lease, pay the penalty fee, Teej. You don’t have to sell yourself!” Jack insisted, yawning.

“I’m not a fucking prostitute, Jesus Christ,” TJ grumbled, removing Jack’s jeans and then working the shirt off his exhausted brother.

Nodding, Jack yawned again. “That’s what I’ve been telling you, Teej. Not a prostitute.”

Rolling his eyes, TJ stripped Jack down to his underwear before pulling the sheets up and over Jack’s body. “Get some sleep, Jack,” TJ ordered, straightening.

Jack obeyed, exhaustion overwhelming him.

From the doorway, very softly, Jefferson asked, “your friend’s not coming in?”

Walking out of Jack’s bedroom, gesturing to Jefferson to follow him back down the stairs, TJ said, “didn’t think Jack would want him in the house. They didn’t exactly get off on the right foot . . .”

“It’s not like he’s your dealer, Tommy,” Jefferson rolled his eyes. “Jack’s asleep now. You gonna stay a while, you might wanna let your buddy in. If you’re going back to your place, the stuff’s all been transferred for you.”

“Can I ask for some advice, first?” TJ asked, looking over at the second oldest Barnes sibling.

“Sure,” Jefferson grinned and sank to the top step, patting the step next to him.

Sinking down, TJ sighed and ran his long fingers through his hair, “Jack wants me to move back in. I guess he wasn’t thinking of Becca’s bedroom when he asked me to find a new place after finding out about Bucky. I - - I . . . but, I signed that contract with Loki and without my half of the rent . . . he won’t be able to afford to keep the place.”

“He had no other offers?” Jefferson asked, proving he thought things through, unlike Jack in his fear over David.

“I don’t know,” TJ answered honestly, putting his head in his hands, “I want to be able to help Bucky and Jack . . . but, I don’t want Loki to be kicked out of his apartment, either.”

“Okay, how would you help Bucky and Jack by living here?” Jefferson asked, his tone one of a teacher asking an academic question, not someone putting down another person.

“I don’t know? Help with Bucky’s care?” TJ said softly.

Jefferson smiled, waiting for TJ to figure out the problem with that particular offer.

“I mean, he has Steve . . .” TJ groaned and put his head in his hands again.

Leaning close to TJ, Jefferson asked, “did you notice the matching bands on their right hands?”

“They’re _married_?” TJ’s head shot up and he looked at Jefferson with wide eyes. How could Bucky not tell them he got married?

“Either that or engaged, TJ. I think Steve’s been trying to pretend not to be closer since he’s an officer and Bucky was enlisted. Probably why Steve left the military, too, when Bucky was discharged.” Jefferson seemed happy. “So, I think Steve’s quite happy to take the brunt of Bucky’s care.”

“But . . . Jack wants me to move back . . .” TJ added softly.

“Jack wants to treat you like you’re Gracie’s age. He has a problem letting go, Tommy.” Jefferson looked to his little brother. “What do you want for yourself, without worrying for the moment about our brothers?”

“I . . . I think I want to stay in the apartment?” TJ said, chewing his bottom lip.

“Ah, freedom!” Jefferson chuckled. “Wise choice, young grasshopper. Spread your wings and discover your world. David’s back tonight and can help Jack. He’s not scheduled to travel for a few more months after this.”

Giving Jefferson a small smile, TJ nodded slowly. “Do you guys think you need me here around much longer for today? Jack’s sleeping, Bucky is with Steve . . .” 

“I always need you around, Tommy,” Jefferson grinned. “But I can make due. I’ll set Gracie to coloring and stuff and keep an ear out for Bucky. Steve knows to contact me if Bucky needs something, because I’m here until Sunday night.” Jefferson leaned into TJ. “Hoping to make your new roomie a study partner?” he grinned wider.

Nodding, TJ stood back up and smiled at Jefferson, “thanks, Jefferson. I promised to send David to wake up Jack . . .”

Saluting with two fingers, Jefferson said, “aye aye, Tommy. I’ll do that.” He stood up and began walking down the stairs in front of TJ.

TJ said goodbye to his brothers, except Jack, before walking out of the apartment to where Loki leaned against his car still. “Hey, thanks for waiting,” TJ smiled at his roommate.

“Your Bucky gonna be okay today?” Loki offered a worried smile to TJ, straightening.

“Jack misunderstood . . . Bucky’s hurt, but he’s going to make a full recovery,” TJ reported, walking up to Loki and leaning up close . . . too close to be considered _friendly_ space. “Thinking we could go out tonight to celebrate?” He grinned widely.

Loki smiled and slipped an arm around TJ’s shoulders, pulling him into a soft kiss, Loki’s lips against TJ’s forehead. He whispered, “I would definitely enjoy going out with you, darling.” He let TJ go and opened the door for his roommate.

“You say that now,” TJ grinned, slipping into the car, “but, you’ve never partied with me before.” He winked at the tall man.

Pausing as he was getting into his car, Loki seemed to think that over. He slid into the car, belting up, and asked, casually, “you need a designated driver, TJ?”

Belting up himself, TJ quirked a brow at Loki, “not much partying if you don’t celebrate, Loki.”

“I have never felt the urge to drink until I lose control in order to celebrate something. I mustn’t be partying correctly.” Loki checked his mirrors as he started the car then pulled onto the low traffic street. “I often think of celebrating as dinner and perhaps a movie.”

“I mean, that can be fun sometimes,” TJ agreed with a nod.

“You enjoy dancing at clubs, perhaps? Instead of a movie?” Loki asked.

“Well, yeah, dancing is always fun,” TJ smiled, glancing at Loki and asked, “hey, do you need an ID or something? I know someone who makes really good ones . . .”

Loki seemed mildly surprised, glancing over at TJ then back to the road. He pulled into his assigned parking space and turned off the car, but he made no move to get out. “TJ, if I am caught doing something against the law, I will be deported.” He watched TJ carefully.

“Oh,” TJ nodded slowly and waved a dismissive hand, “well, when do you turn twenty-one? I just turned twenty-one a few weeks ago . . . August thirteenth.”

“December twenty-first,” Loki responded promptly.

“So, you got some time before you’re legal,” TJ nodded and then grinned at Loki.

Nodding, Loki studied TJ. “I am not so perverse as to disagree with alcohol or such, TJ, but I do not wish to lose my student visa.”

“I get it,” TJ nodded, unbuckling his belt, “no alcohol for you, yet. No worries.”

Nodding, Loki unbelted, smiling finally. “Exactly. Once it is my birthday, I can legally drink alcohol in this state.” He slid from the car and popped the trunk so they could get to TJ’s boxes. The car was a two seater, but it had amazing trunk space. Loki took out one of the boxes.

TJ grabbed another box and said with a smile, “well, would you like to still go out dancing?”

Nodding, Loki said, “I enjoy dancing. Dinner and dancing?” he negotiated, using his arm to close the trunk to hide the other two boxes then heading for the front door of the apartment building, which was open since it was the morning.


	3. Settling for the Holidays

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **WARNINGS: Casual Sex, Drinking, Domestic Abuse - unrecognized**

The club that TJ took Loki to was packed full of young, mostly college aged, people dancing and enjoying one of their last nights of freedom before the new semester started. The music pulsed and the group dancing on the floor seemed to move and grind with the beat. TJ had his arms around Loki’s neck, dancing with his new roommate. Loki moving gracefully with TJ, obviously well trained in dancing if his excellent rhythm was anything to go by. The smaller brunet had already had a few drinks, so, Loki could smell that same sweetness as the night before as well as the bitterness from the smoking.

TJ had dressed in a pair of black skinny jeans that left nothing to the imagination and a tight fitting white shirt that already began to stick to his chest with sweat. Loki, on the other hand, had on light grey slacks and a dark green shirt with a low collar, a pale grey lightweight scarf loosely around his throat and shoulders; he smelled of a sort of deep chocolate scent that was hard to place.

As the song ended, a pair of fingers tapped TJ’s shoulder. In a very interested tone, a male voice said, “can I get in on this, beautiful?” The man was blond, well tanned, bright eyed, and smiling easily, dressed in a light tan shirt and dark brown jeans. He looked familiar, though TJ couldn’t place him.

Looking over his shoulder, TJ beamed brightly; he kissed Loki’s cheek before turning to melt in the other man’s arms as the next song began. In the man’s ear, TJ purred, “you look familiar, handsome.”

Chuckling softly, the man replied, “must be looking in a mirror, ‘cause you are the finest thing out here, beautiful. Name’s Sean.”

“Thomas, but, I go by TJ,” the slim brunet grinned, dancing sensually with his new partner.

“And your last partner? He the jealous type, TJ?” Sean asked on a low purr. Sean ground lightly against TJ.

“He’s just my new roommate,” TJ answered, grinding in return.

Glancing over to where Loki had moved to a high table, sipping his soda, Sean said, “bit of a loner.”

“Tryin’ to get him out more,” TJ commented before running his hands down Sean’s muscular back.

Nodding, Sean whispered against TJ’s ear, “I can hook him up with a friend. Nice girl or guy, whichever turns him on. I got plenty.” He cupped TJ’s ass and squeezed a bit.

“Guy might be good,” TJ mewled with a nod, glancing over to where Loki sat and then back to Sean. He leaned in closer and nipped at the blond’s neck, kissing the skin.

Purring low, Sean asked, “who’s been neglected recently? You needing a bit of loving, TJ?” He ground again, squeezing at the same time.

Moaning low in Sean’s ear, TJ nodded, “yeah . . . got someplace we could go, Sean?”

“How about your place? Your roommate's here, right? You’ll have the room to yourself,” Sean suggested, nipping at TJ’s ear, seeming unaware that it looked like the pair were having sex right there on the dance floor already. “And, look, he’s making a friend,” Sean chuckled, gesturing to Loki with his chin. The raven-haired college student was talking with a very large, beefy blond man who topped him by a bit.

Grinning, happy that Loki wouldn’t be by himself for the evening, TJ nodded, “yeah, let’s get out of here, Sean. I can show you a good time.”

“I am sure you can, TJ,” Sean chuckled, squeezing one last time. “You better like bottom, cause I’m all about top.” He let go, grabbed TJ’s wrist, and led him through the crowd and out to his sports car, a present from his father upon high school graduation.

**************

Yawning, stretching his arms above him like a well-sunned cat, TJ padded into the kitchen where he could smell the coffee already brewing. Sean had left earlier that morning but promised to take TJ out again that night. He ran his hand through his disheveled hair.

Loki stood by the small stove, cooking, the coffee perking next to him, dressed in a pair of silk pajama bottoms. His green silk robe draped open and he wore no slippers on the chilly floor, even with the air conditioner still turned up. Loki had braided his hair neatly and it hung halfway down his back. “Good morning, darling,” he said, softly.

“Morning, Loki,” TJ grinned, walking over to pour himself a cup of coffee and pour some vanilla creamer in it. “Last night was fun, huh?” He offered a wink to his roommate.

“I enjoyed dancing, yes. And you?” Loki asked calmly, plating some eggs and bacon and placing the breakfast, with some toast, on the counter next to TJ. “Fruit or heartier breakfast?” he asked.

“Fruit’s great,” TJ grinned, sipping at his coffee, “dancing was lots of fun. Did you have fun with that blond you were talking to?”

“Blond? Oh, him,” Loki said dismissively. “He didn’t stay long. He was actually scolding me for even being in the club.” Loki moved to rinse his pan then set it in the sink to cool. He reached into the refrigerator and brought out a plate of sliced fruit, uncovering it and placing it near to TJ.

“Scolding you?” TJ frowned, shaking his head, grabbing a piece of the sliced fruit. “Why in the world would some hot guy in a club be scolding you for being there? One of those crazy religious types?”

“He felt that by even being in a club which serves alcohol, I was risking my visa. I had to explain that I was designated driver and therefore was not using alcohol and the bouncer and bartender already knew that.” Loki took his plate and silverware and moved to his chair at the coffee table. He placed his stuff down then went back for his coffee.

Following Loki back to the coffee table with his coffee and fruit, TJ frowned, “did you know him?”

Loki sank to the edge of his chair and began slicing his food with a knife. “Yes, I’ve known Thor my entire life. He is two years my elder.” He took a neat bite of egg and bacon.

“Oh,” TJ nodded, eating at his fruit, not nearly as neatly as Loki with his meal, “I thought he was hitting on you so that’s why I thought it’d be okay to leave with Sean.”

“Hitting on me?” Loki looked up, amusement on his face. “The most hitting on me my brother has done is to pound on me in fencing lessons until he was firmly informed that using the hilt is ungentlemanly.”

TJ sputtered his coffee; he wiped at his lips with the back of his hand and looked at Loki, “you mean that big blond guy was your brother?”

“Yes, and he is very much like our father. My mother has red hair and is more delicate, though not as delicate as I. I do not, in fact, look like any of my family.” He chewed another small bite then swallowed and said, “Sean drove you home and spent some of the night, yes?”

TJ looked over at Loki and nodded, “yeah, he drove. And you said it was okay to have people over?”

“Yes, I did. And I mean it. You are a grown man and entitled to relationships. You even recalled the stricture to mark your door with something to warn me you were not distressed,” Loki gestured with his knife hand towards the tie hanging from TJ’s doorknob. He took a sip of coffee and began to eat again, proving to be ambidextrous as he switched utensils around and his cup to either hand as he chose.

“Yeah,” TJ smiled slowly; he met Loki’s eyes and said, “Sean’s taking me out tonight, too.” The smaller man looked excited at the prospect of another date.

“Will you require a driver or cab fare, TJ? Or does Sean plan to refrain while he’s driving you?” Loki smiled back, taking another bite, hiding his own desperate interest in his lovely roommate. Obviously, he was _not_ TJ’s choice of permanent lover.

“Oh, I don’t know,” TJ smiled and shrugged, “but a few drinks never hurt, especially if he has them early in the night.”

“With dinner is wise, as well. The food dilutes the alcohol. Are you going dancing as well?” Loki asked, sipping his coffee again.

“I’m not sure, actually, Sean told me to be ready by seven,” TJ informed, happy to talk about his new interest without feeling judged.

Having finished his portion, Loki stood and dropped a kiss to TJ’s curls. “Well, my dear, if you find yourself in need of money for lubricant and condoms, there is a jar of loose change and small bills by the front door. I just throw my extra pocket money in there for whenever a need arises. You are welcome to delve in.” He moved back to the kitchen to do his dishes. Loki didn’t say the obvious _and add to_.

Finishing his fruit and coffee, TJ made his way back into the kitchen with the emptied dishes, “you’re the best, you know that?”

Turning, smiling and taking TJ’s dishes, Loki said, “you would do the same for me. We’re friends. We help one another.” He turned to wash those, too. “Do you need to borrow clothing or do your boxes contain the outfit you wish to wear tonight?” Loki had switched his clothes and such into the cream bedroom, but TJ had seen the wonderful array of expensive and designer clothes the raven-haired man had. Judging by appearance only, Loki was quite a wealthy young man, if one did not know about the lack of rent money.

“I think I have some things,” TJ grinned, kissing Loki’s cheek as he walked past to head towards the bedrooms.

“The shower’s all yours, TJ, dear. I’ve already bathed,” Loki called.

“Thanks!” TJ called back, heading back into his room to finish unpacking his few boxes and to start getting ready for that night.

Loki let his smile fall back to his regular neutral expression, his eyes looking sad and almost overwhelmed for a bit. With a shake of himself, he put the dishes in the drain board, shut off the water, hung the towel on the sink handle, and headed to his room to write his weekly check in letter to his mother.

**************

The end of the first week of school finally wrapped up with Loki, Friday night, sinking in his chair surrounded by books and laptop, working feverishly. He had been keeping up with his regular homework, but his two main classes for his majors had assigned reports due after only the first weekend. Loki tried busily to reference information concerning the Kingdom of Kush as well as something concerning how to identify the age of a rock carving using moss and other growth.

The sound of the front door opening and shutting, as well as TJ’s giggling and the deeper voice of Sean came to Loki in the living room. All week, despite it being the first week of school, TJ had been out with Sean, not getting home until late and staying up even later with Sean once they made it to the privacy of TJ’s room.

Loki looked up, frowning at the sudden break in concentration, but the tie was on the doorknob, as it had pretty much been non-stop all week. He sighed and reached over for his headset, putting the earphones on and playing his classical musical to drown out TJ and Sean while he studied. He didn’t hear his own phone ringing, the annoying _’Prince Ali’_ song he’d chosen as the ringtone for Thor rolling out over and over and over.

A sudden weight pressed down against Loki’s shoulders, followed by the sweet scent of TJ’s normal alcoholic beverage. Loki’s phone, ringing loudly, waved in the darker haired man’s face, “phone’s ringing, Lucky!” TJ giggled.

Loki jumped and pulled off the earphones, revealing the sound of Edvard Grieg, a Norwegian classical composer. He flushed a bit and took his phone. “I apologize if I disturbed you, darling,” he said without thinking about how Sean would take the nickname.

“I like that movie, Lucky,” TJ said, still draped over Loki’s shoulders.

Loki smiled, accepting TJ’s nickname for him just as easily as TJ always accepted Loki’s endearments. He answered his phone, not catching the bitter frown on Sean’s handsome face.

“A bit of a kid’s song, isn’t it?” Sean grumped from TJ’s bedroom doorway.

Turning to his new boyfriend, TJ giggled and melted against his lover’s form again, “awe, don’t be like that. Disney is for all ages, Sean.” He kissed the blond’s lips for a moment before pulling away slightly.

Sean smiled at TJ’s kiss and wrapped his strong hands around the other man’s lean waist. He pulled TJ flush to him and said, “yeah? Did they do that song about something being good for kids from one to ninety or something?”

Without thinking, as he hung up the phone after telling Thor he was studying, Loki said, “no, that was _’The Christmas Song’_. And it’s _‘Kids from one to ninety-nine,’_ which makes one wonder if Christmas is no longer acceptable for one hundred year olds.” He opened his book once more.

“Or babies,” TJ commented, laughing, “babies hafta enjoy Christmas, too, huh, Sean? One’s littler than one. You like babies Sean?” Obviously TJ was quite drunk by the way his words slurred and he couldn’t stay completely upright.

Sean stiffened and said, slowly, “we guys can’t have kids together, TJ. You know that.” He sounded wary, distant.

“I love children,” Loki responded without looking up. “I’d adopt if I chose a male for a permanent spouse.”

Grinning, TJ made his way over to Loki and draped his arms around his friend again, “you’re the bestest, Lucky. I ever tell ya that?” He kissed Loki’s cheek.

Smiling, reaching up to place his hand over TJ’s, Loki said, “thank you, my darling. You’re very special to me, too.”

Sean sighed and reached for TJ. “C’mon, TJ. Your bi friend is busy. Let’s go have some fun in the bedroom. Stop thinking about kids. They get in the way.”

“Not uh,” TJ giggled, going where Sean pulled him.

“Well, since neither of us can get pregnant, it’s pointless, thank the Lord,” Sean grumbled.

Loki murmured on a soft snort, “doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy _trying_.”

Sean gave the raven-haired man a look as if Loki had grown two more heads. He muttered, “freak,” and tugged his boyfriend towards the bedroom.

TJ, not having heard Sean’s insult, giggled as the door shut behind them, shutting them away from Loki once more.

**************

TJ danced with Loki at the packed club they were partying at the night of Halloween. He wore fluffy wolf ears and even sported a fluffy tail. He danced close to Loki’s body, his limbs slotted against his roommate’s. Loki has dressed in a black ankle length skirt with a slit all the way to his hip on one side, black high heels, and a black slinky halter top that showed off his shoulders and abdomen. He had his hair pulled back into a fancy braided ponytail and his makeup contained lip stain of blood red and dark eyeliner, as well as the other feminizing enhancements typically found on a goth-style vampiress. He had his arms around TJ’s waist, holding him close.

TJ looked up at Loki; around his eyes were swipes of different shades of grey to match his tail and ears in the pattern of a wolf’s fur. TJ had no idea where Loki had learned to do makeup so well, but he wasn’t going to complain. The smaller man grinned brightly, “you look hot, Lucky.”

“Thank you, darling,” he murmured. “You are the most adorable wolf I’ve ever seen.” Loki didn’t seem at all bothered that TJ’s costume consisted of such minor bits while Loki had gone full out. He actually never found reasons to criticize TJ out loud, keeping any opinions to himself if they were negative and couldn’t be expressed in a positive way.

Grinning wider, TJ leaned up to kiss Loki’s cheek, “thanks!” His pale eyes scanned the crowded club in search of his boyfriend, Sean, who was supposed to be there by then. It wasn’t uncommon that Sean was late, using the excuse of a meeting running late or traffic. TJ sighed softly when his search came up empty, “I’m gonna get another drink . . . want anything? Non-alcoholic of course.” TJ never made Loki feel guilty for not consuming any alcohol while still under the legal age.

“May I walk with you, my dear?” Loki asked, not pushing to accompany his friend but offering.

Nodding, TJ grabbed Loki’s hand and pulled him through the thick crowd towards the bar. Once there, TJ ordered his typical fruity drink and ordered Loki’s favorite soda.

Smiling at TJ, Loki lifted his refreshed drink and held it up for a toast with TJ, just as the bartender leaned over and slipped a napkin to Loki with a phone number written on it. Loki looked at the napkin then at the bartender, his smile slipping.

TJ clinked his drink and then looked down at what held Loki’s gaze. A grin broke across his features, “Lucky! He gave you his number,” TJ bumped playfully against Loki’s shoulder.

Loki lifted his eyes to meet the bartender’s, and the other man winked at Loki. “Enjoy your drink, sweetheart,” he drawled.

Loki lowered the soda, putting the glass on the napkin, letting the condensation destroy the numbers. “Let’s dance, darling,” he said, softly, never taking his eyes off the grinning bartender.

Finishing his drink, TJ smiled at Loki, used to the odd behavior displayed by his roommate, and took his friend’s hand to drag him back to the dance floor. He immediately began dancing again, slotting his body flush against Loki’s again. “Not your type, huh?” TJ asked in Loki’s ear.

“I don’t like the _free candy_ kind, no,” Loki affirmed. He nuzzled at TJ’s neck, kissing his shoulder and neck softly, dancing with his roommate. Loki enjoyed those rare nights when Sean wasn’t there.

Mewling softly, TJ closed his eyes, enjoying the music thrumming through him, Loki’s body pressed so close. He missed Sean and was more than a little upset that it seemed his boyfriend was standing him up . . . again, but at least Loki knew how to keep his mind off things.

Softly in his friend’s ear, Loki said, “it’s almost midnight, darling. Would you like to come home with me and put the tie on the knob?” He could feel TJ’s arousal through their costumes, and Loki knew TJ got very sexual when drinking. Sleeping together with TJ was rare, when Sean stood TJ up only, but it happened maybe twice or three times a month.

Humming, a delighted sounding purr, TJ nodded, “yeah, let’s go have some fun, Lucky.” He kissed his friend’s lips, nipping at the painted flesh.

Responding with his own kisses on TJ’s lips, his lip stain strawberry flavored, Loki began guiding TJ from the dance floor, not bothering to stop their kisses. He got even with the bar when the bartender said, gruffly, “come on, Sweetheart, I can rock you hard. Got a monster cock here for you.”

Loki broke the kiss with a frown, turning to look at the bartender, somehow the look in his eyes denoting a controlled anger. The bartender shut up and shuffled inadvertently back a step as Loki ground out, “no, thank you. I’ve got all the man I want in my arms.”

**************

The next morning TJ barely managed to stumble into his class on time, pretty much running on coffee and a few hours of sleep each night since meeting Sean. Luckily, Loki always had a pot of coffee brewing in time for TJ to depart for his morning classes. TJ smiled softly at the thought of his roommate. He could only assume, since he woke up in Loki’s bed again that morning, that he’d been stood up yet again by his boyfriend. He couldn’t feel guilty for sleeping with Loki when Sean stood him up . . . and never gave a great reason as to why he’d been forced to miss another date.

Running his free hand through his curls, TJ walked into the classroom for his morning piano classes and stopped at the sight of a small stuffed grey wolf with a maroon bow. Walking up to the stuffed animal, TJ picked it up and looked at the tag with his name written on the front in beautiful calligraphy. Flipping the tag over, TJ read the message, _‘to chase the nightmares for you.’_

Smiling softly, TJ ran his fingers over the soft fur. He wondered briefly if the gift was from Sean, who’d known that TJ had been dressing up as a wolf for Halloween. However, Sean didn’t really know about his nightmares . . . only his brothers and Loki did. Why would Loki be sending him a stuffed animal? The only other person TJ could think it’d be was Jefferson, who’d been the one who’d gotten the last late night call from a terrified TJ after waking from such a vivid nightmare.

The instructor looked over and said, “are we ready, Mr. Barnes?” She was not a bad sort, but was fairly strict with her students.

Putting the animal in his backpack carefully, TJ nodded, “yes, ma’am.”

“Good, we are starting a new piece of music, a song by the Norwegian compose Edvard Grieg. He is the most accomplished artist of his country, in my humble personal opinion. None of you may have heard of him, but I assure you,” and she continued to lecture them on the life and work of the composer she’d chosen.

As soon as they started going over the notes, TJ immediately recognized the song as the one that Loki listened to while he studied. The brunet hoped that after this lesson, he’d be able to play the song for his friend and sometimes lover.

When the class wound down, the teacher said, “I want you each to find a song by the composer and learn to play the part of your chosen instrument for us for next week. Write up a report as to why you chose that particular piece, what it means to you, and how it will affect your own musical compositions.” She smiled and tapped TJ’s shoulder. “Cute wolf.” Now that class had ended, she relaxed totally.

TJ grinned up at her, “thanks.”

“And not an unhandsome delivery boy, either,” she chuckled as she headed for her podium and notes.

Scooping up his bag, TJ made his way to the podium, “you saw who delivered the wolf, ma’am?”

“Yes, one of my students, in fact. A second year harpist and pianist from Norway by the name of Loki Odinson.” She gave TJ a smile. “Quite a nice young man, good manners, polite and attentive.”

Breaking into a soft smile, TJ nodded, “yeah . . . I know him. He’s very nice. I didn’t know he played the harp and piano?”

She nodded. “His classes are on Thursday afternoons. He’s taking them as electives, though. I believe he’s a humanities major?” She put her papers in her briefcase and straightened, smiling. “Perhaps if you need an ear to hear you play, you can ask him to sit in after classes? He comes from a long line of musically inclined family. HIs mother was a concert harpist.”

“Was?” TJ frowned, shaking his head.

Laughing lightly, guiding TJ towards the door, she said, “oh, yes, she retired when she married her husband. He’s the Royal Diplomatic Envoy of Harald the Fifth of Norway to Germany. I understand from Loki that he wanted Loki to attend a prestigious German university instead of one here in America. His brother is a physical therapist, well trained in Norway, but is here as a sort of chaperone to Loki.”

Blinking, shocked that he hadn’t known these things about Loki in the few months they’d lived together, TJ said, “well, good thing he chose here . . .” he flashed a smile at his teacher and said, “I’ll see you on Monday, ma’am.”

Nodding, the professor said, “I will see you Monday, TJ. And I look forward to your piece on Edvard Grieg.” She turned to move down the hall to her next destination.

TJ turned in the opposite direction, heading back towards his apartment. On the way there, he saw Loki walking several steps ahead of him. “Lucky!” TJ called, jogging to catch up with his friend.

Loki instantly stopped and turned, offering TJ a smile, ice-green eyes lighting up. “Hello, darling. How was Composition?”

“Great! Guess who I hafta perform a piece on,” TJ grinned, seeming to bounce on the balls of his feet.

“Wagner?” Loki guessed, smiling. “Enrique Granados?”

“Edvard Grieg,” TJ said on a near squeak of excitement. For someone who always looked exhausted, TJ never seemed to run out of energy . . . though, with Sean as a boyfriend it was hard to get rest between going out together and then a night full of lovemaking.

Loki’s smile widened considerably, and it was obvious TJ had found a subject dear to the man’s heart. “Ah, Grieg is a master!”

“You hafta help me pick a piece I could use . . . I didn’t actually listen to him a lot,” TJ grinned, beginning to start walking again, knowing that Loki would follow suit.

Immediately, Loki fell in step and asked, “which piece did she already use? Because if she left it out, _Peer Gynt_ is his best incidental piece.”

“She used _Lyriske Stykker_ ,” TJ reported with a smile.

Loki chuckled, slipping his arm through TJ’s bent elbow. “I use that piece for studying,” he commented. “I would go with _Peer Gynt_ , then, because most Composition students will look to the more formal or folk styles and skip incidental, since it was purely entertainment and not considered academic.”

TJ nodded, “I think I will,” the smaller man leaned his head on Loki’s shoulder as they walked. Softly, as they approached their apartment building, he said, “thank you for the wolf, Lucky.”

“You are most welcome, darling,” Loki smiled and reached up to stroke his long fingers down TJ’s cheek, not unseating his head. “I am sorry you were sad last night. You were such an adorable wolf.”

“Thank you, Lucky,” TJ gave his friend a smile, “and not _all_ of last night was bad. I seem to recall some fun times.” He shot a friend a wink.

“I most clearly recall a very great time,” Loki responded, opening the door for them to enter the building.

**************

Running his fingers through his hair, messing up the neatly styled curls as he paced his and Loki’s living room, TJ said into the phone, “Sean, you _promised_. You said you’d come - -” the brunet paused as Sean cut him off. “But, it’s Thanksgiving, Sean. You said your family was out of the country so that’s why you agreed to come over with me to my brother’s.” TJ stopped talking again, letting his boyfriend give him yet another reason as to why he had to cancel.

Loki looked up from where he attempted to bake some apple-cinnamon rolls in the kitchen part of the main living room. He sighed softly and shook his head then carefully went back to rolling the dough into a tube with the apple chunks and cinnamon inside.

“Of course I want you to spend . . .” TJ snapped his mouth shut and then nodded once, “yeah, I guess you can meet my - - was that a kid crying?” The brunet’s face twisted in confusion.

Loki looked up again, frowning more at what he could hear of the conversation, though limited to only TJ’s words.

“Fine . . . yeah, okay,” TJ sighed softly, looking very disappointed, “you can maybe meet my family for Christmas . . . I know you’re sorry,” the slim man nodded and let Sean talk for several moments, letting his boyfriend explain all these wonderful plans for Christmas for a big family get-together. “Bye, Sean,” he said and then finally hung up the phone.

Loki began slicing the rolls from the longer tube he’d made. He arranged them carefully on the cooking sheets, keeping his voice neutral as he said, “I fear I have misjudged this recipe. I’ll have far too much for the two of us to consume.”

Looking over at Loki, TJ slipped his phone in his pocket. “They smell delicious, Lucky,” the smaller man looked like he tried so hard to contain his disappointment.

“I will hope they smell better as they cook then,” Loki offered a smile, turning and sliding both sheets into the preheated oven. “Do you think I can send them with you to your Thanksgiving celebration? Your brothers might like them, yes?” he asked casually. “Thor will be far too busy with his girlfriend to want to eat with me.”

“Hey,” TJ smiled slowly as an idea crossed his mind, “what are you doing tonight?”

Loki lifted his eyes, not giving away that he’d made a play for that very invitation. “I have nothing to do aside from studying.”

“Why don’t you come with me to Jack’s and David’s? Bucky should be feeling a lot better now. When I visited a week ago, he was practicing his writing with his right hand.” TJ grinned brightly at the idea of taking Loki with him.

“If you are sure they will not be disappointed that you are bringing your _old_ roommate with you, I accept gladly. I would enjoy meeting your family, TJ.” Loki wiped his hands on the handy towel he kept by on the off chance he tried something creative in the kitchen. “Shall I bring something else? Wine? A dish of food?”

“We can bring your cinnamon rolls?” TJ offered.

“I meant above and beyond that trifling, my darling,” Loki chuckled.

“Uh, those cinnamon rolls are very important, thank you very much,” TJ grinned, taking Loki’s hand to drag his friend back to Loki’s room. “Gotta get ready, Lucky. Gonna be my date for the evening.”

“I accept. I will enjoy being your date,” Loki smiled and brushed his lips lightly over TJ’s, as he often did. “Shall I wear my emerald or go for my jade?” A lot of Loki’s clothes were in jewel tones or green shades.

“Jade,” TJ said, gesturing to the shirt in that specific color. Despite always being in Loki’s room, TJ never invited his friend into _his_ room, the door always remaining shut. Anytime they’d sleep together it had always been in Loki’s room.

Loki slipped gracefully to his closet, stripping as he walked, slowly exposing his body. He often walked around nude if Sean wasn’t there, apparently quite comfortable in his own skin. And, as it was late November, the air conditioning had been long turned off and the heat turned on, though it never seemed very hot in the apartment, kept at a cool sixty-five. Leaving his door wide open, Loki began collecting his bathing gear so he could enjoy a soothing bath. Calling out, he said, “TJ, my dear, would you care to join me in a long soak? We have half an hour before the rolls are ready.”

TJ looked down at himself, already dressed since he had been planning on Sean picking him up a lot earlier than they were due for dinner. He shrugged and started unbuttoning his own dress shirt, letting it fall to the floor, stripping much like Loki had done.

“I have lavender bath bomb,” Loki called, naming a scent both relaxing and sexually alluring.

Making it into the bathroom, completely nude and cock already beginning to swell with arousal, TJ grinned at his friend. In this lighting it was clear that TJ had lost some weight over the last few months.

Loki smiled, noting TJ’s interest, and reached for the drawer of condoms he kept in the bathroom. “Shall I dress for you, my darling?” He noted the troubling weight loss but promised to himself to keep an eye on what TJ consumed, making sure to provide him fruit every morning for breakfast and something for dinner, as well.

Smiling, TJ nodded, “yeah.”

“I think prelubricated this time. Are you open enough or do I work on you first?” Loki asked, sliding into the still empty tub and slipping the condom over his erection, already full for TJ.

Grinning wide, TJ made his way over to the tub and climbed in, his back to his friend and lover. “Tell me, Lucky,” the smaller man purred low, impaling the other man’s tip into his tight, open, passage. “Am I open enough for you?”

“Yes, my dear, you feel wonderful. I am complete inside you,” Loki breathed. He kissed the back of TJ’s neck and reached over, setting a timer for a half hour. He then used computer control to start the faucet at their feet, the bathroom hooked up to his tablet, which he kept well away from the water. “Can you reach the bowl of bath bombs, darling?”

Nodding, TJ looked over his shoulder, “the lavender one, you said?”

“Yes, to stimulate and relax us. I think this bath can be used to warm me deep inside you. Do you want me to stroke you? We’ll have to change the water when you ejaculate.”

“How about for right now we just relax?” TJ suggested, grabbing the desired bath bomb and dropping it into the water.

“A sound idea, darling,” Loki kissed behind TJ’s ear and settled down to relax in the heat of the tub under the welcome weight of his lover, buried deep in that tight heat.

Letting out a soft breath, letting the scent of lavender relax him, TJ settled down on Loki’s lap. Sean would never think to enjoy a nice long bath with TJ . . . none of his past lovers would’ve. He turned his head to kiss at Loki’s jaw, “you’re amazing, Lucky.”

“Am I? And you read my mind. I was thinking the same words of you, my dear.” Loki smiled, ice-green eyes lazily half-lidded, smoky lust creeping into them.

“Not amazing,” TJ murmured, looking just as relaxed as Loki.

“Allow me my opinion and I will allow you your’s,” Loki murmured, kissing TJ’s neck. “For I think you wonderful and clever and sensual.”

Humming softly, not voicing his argument this time, TJ turned to nuzzle at Loki’s neck. Just like any other time, the smaller man didn’t feel guilty for loving Loki while he was technically together with Sean. TJ loved Sean, but he also craved love and attention which Sean didn’t give him because he always cancelled.

Loki turned his head to seal their lips into a gentle kiss. He brushed TJ’s hair from his forehead and smiled softly. “Sweet,” he murmured. “So sweet, darling.”

Smiling, TJ met his friend’s eyes; he lifted his hand to trace his fingers down Loki’s thin, athletic torso. “You’re the best, Lucky . . . I ever tell you that before?” TJ breathed out, lips still pulled into a smile.

Chuckling, Loki kissed TJ’s temple, “sometimes, but I will not stop you from trying to convince me, my dear. And I feel you are well matched with me. Your beauty, my beauty. Your genius, my intellect.”

Snorting softly, TJ shook his head, “definitely no genius, Lucky.” He pulled off Loki’s cock so he could turn to face the other man before sinking back down. Slowly, he released Loki’s hair from his long braid. TJ grabbed some shampoo and squeezed some into his palm. he gently, carefully began washing his friend’s hair, massaging the scalp.

Almost purring, Loki’s eyes closed and he leaned slightly forward to allow TJ easier access. Loki took the opportunity to begin gently kissing TJ’s nude shoulder, lapping and gently brushing his lips over the flesh again and again. “Taste so sweet,” he murmured.

Letting out a soft mewl, TJ didn’t stop from his task of washing Loki’s long, silky hair. “Lucky? Would you answer a question . . . honestly?”

“Yes, I would. Did you want to ask me another?” Loki teased lightly, lifting his lips and smiling at TJ.

“Ha ha,” TJ shook his head, letting out a soft laugh. After a moment, he met his friend’s eyes again and asked, “why’d you choose to come to America to study? Didn’t you father want you to study in Norway?” He wanted to get to know Loki more . . . they’d been friends and sometime-lovers for a few months now and TJ hardly knew anything _personal._

“He wanted me to study in Germany,” Loki answered, kissing TJ’s lips. “But I wanted to walk my own path. As Thor has a practice here, Father agreed to allow me to come here under his chaperonage. Thus, I chose to come here.” Lifting his eyes to meet TJ’s, Loki sighed softly. “I am too used to having funds to hand, so I did not have the courage to study where I would not have support.”

“And your father . . . he doesn’t pay for your rent?” TJ asked, curious to why Loki struggled to pay the entire rent when it seemed as if the other man hardly struggled for anything else. TJ didn’t offer his own reason as to why _he_ was able to afford to pay for his half and anything else without actually having a job.

“I am provided enough for expenses if I live with Thor. I determined I would give up half of that for rent, but it’s not enough to live alone. I am pleased you chose to live with me, my dear.” Loki smiled, apparently not disturbed by answering questions. “As well, if there are no negative reports about me as Thor checks in every week, Mother sends me an allowance for clothing and other items I don’t technically need.”

Nodding, TJ began to rinse out Loki’s long locks, making sure to get all the soap out. He offered his friend a smile, “that’s nice,” he met Loki’s eyes, their faces only a few inches apart, “do you and your brother get along?”

“As long as I am not required to spend any length of considerable time obeying him, I enjoy spending time with Thor. We used to play together, fight together, get into mischief . . . or should I say, I would talk Thor into getting into mischief then go rescue him.” Loki chuckled. “We are two years apart, but often it seemed I was the elder.”

TJ opened his mouth to ask another question when Loki’s timer went off, denoting that the cinnamon rolls needed to be taken out of the oven. The smaller brunet let out a soft sigh and then offered Loki a smile, “guess bath time is over?”

“For now, my darling, but the glory is, we can bathe again later. I have many more bath bombs.” Loki kissed TJ then patted his hips. “Up, my dear.”

Nodding, TJ easily slipped off Loki and stepped out of the bath, grabbed a towel and then holding a second one out to his friend. “Will this be your first Thanksgiving? Or do they have something similar in Norway?”

Loki laughed and stood, drying off as he walked from the bathroom. He carefully removed the apple-cinnamon rolls from the oven and began putting each roll on cooling racks. “We have a Harvest Feast.”

TJ followed Loki out, drying as he went, “oh? Sounds fun.” He smiled and sniffed the air, “those cinnamon rolls smell amazing! Have you always been such an amazing cook?”

Chuckling, Loki said, “if you base your assumption on this recipe, you are misinformed. This is an experiment.” He turned to smile at his roommate, giving TJ a kiss. “It smells like it worked well, though.”

“An experiment?” TJ asked against Loki’s lips.

“Yes, I’ve never made these before,” Loki smiled, kissing again. “Which is why I said, earlier, that I should bring something more than only these. What if they only _smell_ good?”

“We can stop at the market on the way over? Pick up a bottle of wine and . . . I don’t know, some dinner rolls or something? And I doubt they just _smell_ good, I know they _look_ delicious,” TJ grinned at his roommate, ruffling the towel through his hair, making the curls stand up wildly.

Loki laughed and used his own towel to start squeezing and patting his long hair dry. It was the first time Loki had appeared outside of bed or the shower with his hair down; he always kept it braided. Loki’s hair had a wave to it. “We need to dress, my dear,” he said, walking past TJ and giving him a smouldering look.

As if in a trance, TJ followed Loki into the bedroom, despite his own clothes being in his own room. Once close enough, TJ slipped his hands around Loki’s narrow hips, down over the taller man’s cock. “Something else smells delicious . . .” TJ purred low in Loki’s ear.

Loki kissed TJ on the cheek, right by his ear, and purred, “when we come home, this will be hot and waiting for your loving, my darling.”

“What if I want it now, Lucky?” TJ kissed the shell of Loki’s ear, his warm breath caressing down the taller man’s neck. Loki could smell the scent of alcohol on TJ’s breath that the brunet had apparently tried to cover with brushing his teeth earlier.

Loki kissed him. “Very well, but we’ll smell of sex at your brother’s home for dinner, my dear.”

Sighing softly, TJ buried his face in Loki’s shoulder, breathing in his friend’s scent before pulling back. “Yeah, I guess we should probably wait until we get back . . .” He backed out of the room and into his own, shutting the door behind him.

Loki dressed in the jade outfit TJ had picked out, drying his hair before braiding it and pinning it up into a smooth, plaited bun. Several minutes passed before TJ slipped out of his room dressed in black slacks and a white button down. He smiled at Loki, moving to grab his keys and wallet from the bowl near the front door. “Ready?” TJ asked.

“Very much,” Loki walked into the kitchen and packaged the rolls. He took his car keys, wallet, phone, and apartment keys, pocketing all the small items. Lifting the containers of food, Loki headed out of the apartment, smiling at TJ in passing. “I do hope your brothers don’t dislike me as much as the first time the eldest met me.”

“Well, you’ve only met Jack and he was pretty stressed out because of Bucky, and his husband, David, was traveling,” TJ answered, following Loki out, making sure to lock the door behind them. “Did you want to stop? I mean, I think the cinnamon rolls are enough but . . .” he let the sentence die off, glancing at his friend.

“If you are certain, I shall trust your judgement, my dear,” Loki said with a smile. “You know your family best.”

“I think they’ll love your cinnamon rolls,” TJ smiled at Loki.


	4. Thanks for Wrecking the Holidays

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **WARNINGS: alcohol, family fights, anxiety, car accident, abuse**

Loki pulled up in front of the townhouse he remembered. Smiling at TJ, studying the other brunet, Loki softly said, “TJ? You don’t look as happy as when we were home.”

Blinking, TJ turned to look at Loki, plastering on a social smile that didn’t quite meet his eyes. “I’m good, Lucky. Fine . . .” He looked at the townhouse again and let out a breath before opening the door. He grabbed the cinnamon rolls and flashed another smile to Loki, “ready to head into the lion’s den?”

“I will face lions for you, my darling.” Loki slid from his car, taking the other container of rolls. He managed to shut the door and lock his car before joining TJ on the sidewalk. “Who will be here?”

“Jack and his husband David, Bucky and his new husband Steve, Jefferson and his daughter Grace,” TJ answered, licking his lips and walking towards the front door. With his free hand, the other cradling the container of rolls, TJ knocked on the door three times before letting his hand fall to his side.

The door swung open rather quickly and Jack stood there. A wide smile crossed his face and he tugged TJ into a solid hug, “Teej! You made it!”

TJ went with the hug, managing to not drop the container before pulling back, “Jackie . . . you remember Loki, right? My roommate. Uh . . . Sean couldn’t make it.”

Jack looked over TJ’s shoulder at Loki then sighed. Smiling, he stepped around his brother and offered his hand to Loki. “It’s Thanksgiving. You’re welcome here. It’s a shame Sean was busy.”

Loki shook Jack’s hand, graceful and appearing delicate despite topping Jack by almost three inches. “Thank you for your hospitality. I hope you do not dislike apple cinnamon rolls.” He hoisted the one container.

Blinking, Jack looked down then up. “Uh . . . sounds great. Come in.” He turned to his brother. “Come in, the others are all here.”

Swallowing thickly, TJ nodded and glanced back at Loki before following Jack through the house towards the kitchen where the scents of fragrant food being cooked came to them. TJ set his container on the kitchen counter and smiled at his two other brothers.

Steve grinned at the trio entering the kitchen and got up from the table where he sat with Bucky. “Hey, TJ,” he gave his brother-in-law a smile and a hug. The large blond gave Loki a friendly grin, “Hello, I’m Steve Rogers, Bucky’s husband,” he held out his hand to Loki.

Loki smiled and shook Steve’s hand, a strength in the delicate boned limb. “Hello, Steve. I’m Loki, TJ’s roommate.” He brandished the container, “where would these go?”

Taking the container that TJ had set down, Steve offered his hand to take Loki’s as well, “I can put them next to the pie?”

Loki gave over the rolls with a smile. “Thank you, Steve.” He turned to meet the rest of the family, smiling expectantly at TJ.

“Oh,” TJ flushed and rubbed the back of his neck, “Bucky, Jefferson . . . this is my roommate, Loki Odinson.” He gestured with his other hand to his tall friend.

Loki shook hands with Jefferson and Bucky then turned to the blond sitting near Jack’s chair, which the eldest Barnes slid into.

Standing, the blond gave Loki a warm smile, holding out his hand, “David Barnes, Jack’s husband,” he didn’t seem offended that TJ had forgotten him in the introductions. David seemed like a very easy-going guy; it was easy to see how he balanced out Jack’s overly strict, easily overwhelmed nature.

Loki offered his hand and shook David’s. “I trust your travels went well?”

“Oh, yeah,” David laughed, leaning over to kiss Jack’s temple before turning his eyes back to Loki. “Won’t be traveling again until at least after the new year . . . so, that’s a plus. It’s nice to finally meet you, Loki, when TJ comes over you’re almost all he talks about.”

Chuckling, Loki stood there next to David’s chair. He smiled over at TJ. “I have long anticipated meeting my darling roommate’s family.”

Jack’s smile slipped at the way Loki spoke about TJ.

TJ flushed bright red and reached for an open bottle of wine; he poured himself a decent sized glass and brought it to his lips. He gave Jack and David an almost nervous seeming smile, “sorry I haven’t brought him over before . . .” he drank another sip and turned his attention to Bucky, “Buck, how’s the therapy for the arm going?”

“Not bad,” Bucky grinned, though he seemed tired and had lost weight. “Tougher some days than others.” He smiled towards Steve. “I’m lucky a nurse fell in love with me.”

Steve laughed and settled back down next to Bucky, wrapping his arm around his husband’s shoulder, “not as lucky as I am that you fell in love with me . . .”

“Who else could carry me when I fall down the steps?” Bucky laughed.

Jefferson sipped his wine, his daughter, Gracie, playing on the floor with some stuffed animals. The father looked from his daughter to the others. “Steve’s told us his brother might show?”

“Yeah,” Steve confirmed with a nod, seeming relaxed and happy, “Frank and his little girl, Mary, might come by. He wasn’t sure if he’d be able to make it, but he promised he’d try.”

Gracie looked up. “Will she wanna play? I can share my toys, Uncle Stevie.”

Steve smiled and looked down at the little girl, “I’m sure Mary would love to play with you, Gracie. Thank you for offering to share your toys.”

“She’s family. She shouldn’t have to be bored around the grown-ups,” Gracie said with a firmness in her voice.

Jefferson chuckled.

TJ finished his glass and began filling another for himself. He looked over at Loki.

Jack stood and walked past TJ, taking his glass. “Wait for dinner, Teej.” He tried to sound light and airy, but there was worry in his tones.

Frowning, TJ looked after his eldest brother; his hand stayed in the air for a few moments before dropping it, his fingers thrumming against his thigh. He looked over at Loki again, “did you want sparkling cider or something? Water?” The smaller man looked anxious and tense but trying so desperately to hide it under a plastered on smile.

“I’ll share sparkling cider, darling,” Loki said, smiling at TJ, still standing between David and Steve.

Nodding once, TJ poured Loki a glass of cider and himself a glass of water. He handed the bubbling beverage to his friend, “did you want to sit, Loki? I should probably go ask if there is anything I can help with. Uh . . .” TJ gestured to the table where several empty seats were, “my family doesn’t bite . . . most of the time, that is. Watch Bucky though . . .” there was a edge of teasing for the middle Barnes sibling.

Bucky laughed heartily. “My goal is to be on the _Walking Dead_. I plan to infect zombies with human-virus.”

TJ gestured to the table again with an encouraging nod to Loki before ducking out of the dining room into the kitchen. “Jack? Anything you need help with?” He set his glass on the counter.

Loki followed TJ, smiling towards Jack briefly.

Jack frowned and called, “David is cooking, Teej. Come back and stop trying to work yourself to death. Enjoy being with us.”

“Come back?” TJ’s brows furrowed, but he shook his head, picking up his glass of water again, “just offerin’ to help, Jack.” The youngest sibling turned out of the kitchen. He walked back to the table, picking up another glass and pouring a fresh glass of wine.

Jack frowned and sighed. “TJ, what’s the problem? You seem nervous. Come, wait for dinner before you drink more or you’ll get tipsy. You don’t want that, Teej.”

“No?” TJ snorted softly, lips pulled into a small smile as he sipped at the wine in his glass. He met his eldest brother’s eyes from across the table, “and why is that?”

“Ever been drunk, Teej?” Jack smiled, trying to keep his patience. “You’ll feel like crap in the morning: headache, vomiting . . .”

“Not if you keep drinking. No hangover,” TJ grinned cheekily at his brother, “if you don’t stop.” He took another sip and his eyes flickered over to look at Jefferson, rudely ending his conversation with Jack, “Jefferson, how’s the store going?”

“Fine, especially this time of year. Everyone wants toys for this season, right?” Jefferson leaned back slightly in his chair, watching TJ. “If we run out of dinner wine, you’ll be forced to stop drinking, Tommy. Think of that?” he grinned.

Letting his eyes close and then open again, setting his glass down on the table, TJ smiled “right, how _silly_ of me.”

Jefferson shrugged. “Not _silly_ , Tommy, just a bit short sighted. Thanksgiving. The liquor stores aren’t open tonight.” The man looked towards the door at the sound of knocking. “Maybe Steve’s brother? Or our sister?”

TJ slipped away from the table at the sound of the knocking since neither Jack, Jefferson, or Bucky got up to answer. He opened the door, blinking at the sight of an unknown man and a little girl. “Must be Steve’s brother,” TJ said, “they’re straight through to the right,” he gestured in the direction the others were in. TJ slipped out the front door as Frank Rogers, who looked surprised, stepped inside with his daughter, Mary. The door shut behind them.

Frank followed the directions TJ had given them and waved to the group on the inside, “uh . . . hello? I’m Frank Rogers and this is my daughter, Mary.”

Jack began introductions, frowning, looking beyond Frank’s shoulder. Finally, he asked, “where’d TJ go?”

“That the smaller guy that looks like you three?” Frank asked, gesturing to Bucky, Jack, and Jefferson.

“Yes, TJ went to open the door. Teej!” Jack called louder.

Loki’s smile became a bit strained, standing in the kitchen doorway.

“He went outside as we came in,” Frank reported, his hand still resting gently on Mary’s shoulder, “he looked like he was in a hurry to go somewhere.”

The timer in the kitchen went off, alerting David that dinner was ready. Jefferson got up to help begin plating food and serving it, at David’s direction. Bucky frowned but watched the others, softly saying, “Gracie, come meet Mary.”

Loki sighed and sat at the table like a very well-behaved guest. He didn’t leave, didn’t bring up any subject, politely answering questions as the night went on, though he wasn’t as open as he’d been with TJ in private.

**************

Late on Thanksgiving night, Loki opened the door to the apartment and sighed softly. He let himself in then locked the door behind him, heading for the kitchen area of the main room. Putting the containers on the counter, Loki left them there a moment as he put his two sets of keys, his phone, and his wallet on the small table by the door. He took off his shoes and socks then stripped off the Jade colored outfit as he walked to his room, exhausted, head throbbing.

Putting his clothing in the correct hampers, per cleaning needs, Loki walked back out to put the two remaining rolls into a smaller container to store, and then begin to wash the dirtied larger containers, as well as the pans and cooling racks he’d left earlier. The night had been horrid and Loki wish he’d just taken TJ to Thor’s place, instead.

Almost an hour later there was a knock at the door and then a solid thud to the wall right next to it in the hall. With a sigh, Loki dried his hands and walked to the door of the apartment. He called through the door, “TJ?”

From the floor next to the door, his head leaning against the wall, TJ sluggishly looked up. “I’m . . . TJ,” he slurred; for once, he didn’t sound overly happy and giggly as he often got when he drank. His voice was rough, miserable sounding.

Nodding, Loki grabbed up his long dark green duster from beside the door and slipped it on, closing it with one hand to cover his nudity. He opened the door and squatted down, careful not to expose himself to the hallway. “Oh, darling, this _has_ been a rough day for us both. Come inside and let’s bathe.” Loki’s voice came out soft and tired.

“I’m . . . sorry, Lucky . . . horrible . . .” TJ’s voice cracked and he made no movements to get up from where he’d fallen against the wall. “‘M horrible . . . ‘m nothing . . . deserve better . . .”

“And I, again, disagree. Families are enough to drive one to drink, I suppose. And you were already doubly disappointed in both Sean and I. Come. We will go inside and relax together.” Loki began helping TJ up from the floor.

“Why doesn’t . . . Sean wanna meet my family? Never . . . never been to his house, Lucky. Why . . . why won’t he let me see his house?” TJ stumbled against Loki’s side as the taller man helped him off the floor. 

“If he meets your family, my darling, he will be required to allow you to meet his. Perhaps he is ashamed of his family.” Loki got TJ in far enough to close and lock the door. He began heading towards the bathroom. “Shall I discuss it with him, my dear?”

“He’s probably . . . ‘shamed of me . . . ‘m disappointment,” TJ could barely lift his feet as Loki guided them to the bathroom, dragging one foot after another. “‘Ways have been, Lucky . . .”

“Then you shall want help improving yourself, so you no longer disappoint yourself. Where were you able to find enough alcohol to get drunk on tonight, darling?” Loki set TJ on the toilet and began undressing him.

“Some bars open, Lucky . . .” TJ murmured, like always, not stopping Loki from removing his clothing. “There are . . . always some bars open . . . even on Thanksgiving an’ Christmas . . .”

“I see,” Loki responded. He slid TJ’s shirt off of him then his belt, shoes, and socks. Standing TJ up, Loki allowed his roommate to lean heavily on him as he undid and slid off TJ’s pants. Finally, he walked TJ to the tub and sat him on the edge, using one hand to support him as Loki removed the coat and let it fall to the floor. He climbed into the tub and sat down, maneuvering TJ onto his lap like they had earlier.

Sniffling softly, TJ leaned back against Loki’s chest, the smell of cigarettes and heavy liquor coming off the smaller man. “I’m sorry, Lucky . . . bad friend . . . .”

“And why do you feel you are a bad friend?” Loki grabbed for the lube they’d left on the bathroom floor and reached between them to begin lubing himself and TJ’s entrance.

“Bad at everything . . . left you there . . .” TJ whimpered, for once not responding to the opening pleasure of Loki’s fingers.

“TJ,” Loki purred in TJ’s ear, nipping slightly behind it, “I saved you two of my rolls.”

“Not . . . not very hungry,” TJ swallowed thickly, staying still in Loki’s arms, not stopping the sexual attentions but not exactly reacting to it either.

“TJ, you do not have to eat them tonight or ever. You are tense. Do you wish me to help you relax so we might speak about your troubles?” Loki’s hand stilled, two fingers inside his lover.

“Don’t . . . deserve it,” TJ answered, breath hitching in the back of his throat. “Don’t deserve . . . any of this . . .”

Tilting his head, Loki sighed. “And you will punish yourself for having a boyfriend who is ashamed of himself and his family, and a family who pushes you and treats you like a child?” He stroked TJ’s chin with his clean hand.

Lip trembling, though no tears fell, TJ shook his head, “just wanna . . . be good enough . . .”

Smiling gently and brushing his lips over TJ’s, Loki whispered, “you are more than good enough for me, darling. Next time we do a holiday that Sean has been too arrogant to come to, we shall go meet Thor. If you wish, I can take you to meet him tomorrow. I am not ashamed of you.”

“Wanna be good enough,” TJ repeated, turning his body so he could rest his head on Loki’s shoulder, curling up his body in his friend’s lap.

“You _are_ good enough,” Loki purred and kissed TJ’s head, stroking his shoulder and neck. He slid his fingers from TJ’s body but brought his hand around to caress gently over TJ’s cock and balls. “Sean is not good enough for you, my darling.” Using a foot, Loki managed to turn on the faucet and get the temperature correct without burning or overly freezing either of them. He clicked the tub stopper and let the bath begin filling. “My darling,” Loki cooed to his friend.

**************

TJ shuffled out of Loki’s room, hair ruffled and only wearing a pair of Loki’s silk sleep pants which hung low on his hips. He ran his fingers through his disarrayed curls as he made his way out into the living room and kitchen, knowing Loki would’ve brewed some coffee before he left to visit his brother, Thor.

Rubbing his eyes, TJ paused, one fist still over an eye; he paused at the sight of another wolf, this one white, sitting on the kitchen counter next to the container with two of Loki’s rolls sitting in it. He lowered his hand and walked the rest of the way, picking up the finely made toy and running his fingers through it’s fur. It seemed to be made exactly the same as the other two Loki had given him, except one was grey and the other black.

Smiling softly, TJ carefully set the wolf back down and headed over to make himself a cup of coffee. He put one of the rolls in the microwave and brought it back to the counter once it was warmed. Picking at the warm roll, TJ ate at it slowly between sips of his coffee, watching the stuffed wolf as he did. He didn’t know where Loki got the toys, but they never failed to make him smile . . . and every time Loki gave him a wolf came the day after one of the times Sean had stood him up.

A hurried knocking came on the apartment door, as if someone needed something desperately.

Frowning, TJ left his half eaten roll and coffee to walk over to the door. He looked out the peephole and his frown deepened in worry. Unlocking the door, TJ opened it, “Sean? What’s wrong?”

Sean’s eyes roved over TJ in the too-long pants and then shot to his boyfriend’s face. “You okay? I was so worried about you, baby!” Sean walked into the apartment; he was carrying a large bottle of one of TJ’s favorite alcohols.

Eyes falling to the bottle of alcohol in Sean’s hand and then lifting to meet Sean’s eyes as he passed, TJ shut the door and turned back to his boyfriend. “Why? Why wouldn’t I be okay?”

Sean headed towards the kitchen area and stopped when he saw the toy. Frowning, placing the bottle on the counter, Sean turned and looked over TJ again. Slowly, he said, “because I thought you may have gotten hurt. I came over last night and you weren’t here. I wanted to tell you I got free after all. But,” he glanced at the toy and picked it up, turning it this way and that a bit disgusted, “I see you _aren’t_ depressed, are you. Got yourself a _friend_? A _lover_ perhaps?” He slammed the wolf onto the counter.

Jumping slightly at the slam, TJ’s eyes widened and he stammered, “what? I - - I . . . no!” He could hear his heartbeat rushing through his ear. “Loki gave it to me!” He feared that Sean would figure out that TJ had been sleeping with Loki sometimes. “Sean . . .” he stepped up to his boyfriend, “you know I love you, baby . . .”

“And, _why_ would your _roommate_ give you stuffed dogs? That’s a bit childish, isn’t it?” He glared, looking very hurt. “What, a working class boyfriend isn’t enough? Have to throw yourself at a rich kid snob?” Sean crossed his arms, as if protecting himself.

“I - - I’m not!” TJ said back, eyes wide, “he . . . he gives them to me to cheer me up, I swear! That’s it! I . . .” his eyes fell slightly, as they often did when he lied, unable to meet Sean’s gaze, “we aren’t . . . we don’t . . .”

“So, if I was to ask around school, no one would be telling me you and Loki are fucking?” Sean asked in a petulant tone.

“Sean,” TJ whimpered, swallowing thickly as he forced his eyes to lift to meet his boyfriend’s, “I love you . . . you know I do . . .”

“You _say_ that, but then you aren’t here when I’m available. You’re accepting gifts from your roommate and, what? Sleeping in his clothes? TJ . . . how do you think that makes me feel?” Sean shook his head.

“What am I supposed to do?” TJ threw his hands in the air, pale eyes anguished, “he gives them to me to cheer me up after _you_ cancel. And I am available, all the time for you! _You_ cancel on _me_!”

“You weren’t here for me last night. What? Dinner went until nine or ten?” Sean frowned, but his tone has softened a little, though he sounded hurt.

Swallowing thickly, TJ licked his lips and said, “I - - I don’t know how late it went. I - - I left . . . early . . . It was a bad night, Sean . . .” he wrapped his arms around himself.

Sean sighed. “Don’t pout, TJ. It’s not attractive. You just look needy.” He walked over and wrapped his arms around TJ. “You know I love you, baby. I just get so _jealous_ when I think of someone else even touching my guy.”

Releasing a sigh, TJ buried his face in Sean’s shoulder, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend tightly. “I’m sorry, Sean. I . . . I’ll be here for you more. I’m sorry I wasn’t here last night . . .”

Nodding and cuddling TJ close, Sean whispered, “I know you try hard, baby. And I really do notice. But you really have to try harder not to be so selfish all the time. Being the baby of a large family made you _expect_ things. Now, you love me, so tell your snotty roommate he can keep his expensive gifts he’s trying to buy you with.”

Pale eyes shining with unshed tears, TJ pulled back to look at the toy on the counter and then up at Sean. “I - - I don’t think that’s why he does it, Sean . . .”

“Because, TJ, my naive little fool,” Sean frowned, “he wants to fuck you and thinks he can _buy_ you like some whore.” Sean turned so only one arm remained around TJ. “Where is he, anyway? Hiding in his room?”

“No, he’s visiting his brother, Thor, since they couldn’t be with one another yesterday,” TJ reported, trying to push away the ache in his chest at Sean’s brutally honest words. Did he expect things from people? Was he a naive fool to think Loki gave him gifts just to be nice to him?

“Why couldn’t he just spend Thanksgiving with his brother like normal people?” Sean frowned, glaring towards Loki’s bedroom door.

“I - - I’ll talk with him tonight, Sean,” TJ promised, chewing at his bottom lip.

“Good, you do that.” Sean nodded then looked over TJ’s attire once more, frowning again. “Go get dressed. He’s going to see you in that and think he can fuck you.”

Nodding, TJ slipped from under Sean’s arm to go change, trying to push down all his negative feelings. He didn’t want to burden anyone with his _needy_ attitude.

**************

Walking up the steps to Jack and David’s townhouse, TJ knocked on the door hesitantly. Jack had called him and told him to come over right away. Over the phone, Jack had sounded angry and worried, though he refused to tell TJ what was wrong over the phone. TJ had borrowed Sean’s car instead of making the cold walk, but now, on the doorstep, he huddled against the cold December wind as he waited for his brother to answer the door.

The door opened and Jack grabbed TJ by the arm and hurried him inside and to the kitchen. In there, the oldest Barnes brother put a cup of hot chocolate in front of the youngest and sat down. “Care to tell me how?” he asked.

Furrowing his brows, TJ met his eldest brother’s eyes, “tell you what, Jackie?”

“How,” Jack slid a letter to TJ, “you planned to be an accepted composer if you flunk out of school?”

TJ paled and looked down at the letter in front of him, written by his composing professor to explain her worries to Jack about TJ failing her classes. Lifting his head, TJ stammered, “this year’s . . . just been harder, Jack. I - - I’ll study harder . . .” he didn’t explain that the reason he’d be failing his classes was that Sean insisted they go out every night instead of TJ staying in to finish his homework or study for exams.

Nodding, Jack passed another paper to TJ, “or where your tuition for next semester is? Because if Loki’s rent is too high, you can come home, Teej.”

Eyes widening slightly, TJ looked down at one of his bank statements showing his too low account and then back to Jack. “I - - I . . . it’s not the rent . . .” he chewed his bottom lip, pale eyes worried.

“Then what, Teej? What else could you be spending it on?” Jack asked, frowning.

TJ tried to come up with a good excuse that Jack would accept, “I . . . I . . .” he licked his lips and changed tactics, “I’ll get a job, Jackie.”

“If you can't even keep up in school right now,” Jack shook his head, “how do you think you can do that with a job, too? When would you study?”

“I’ll find time . . . uh, I’m sorry, Jackie, really. I’ll study harder and find a job or something. They were hiring at the library or something . . . I could study while I work?” TJ didn’t want to tell his eldest brother that he’d blown through a lot of his money going out drinking.

“TJ, you have until the end of this semester to bring that grade up enough not to flunk the class. And I’ll cover next semester, but you’ll have to pay me back. That was your share of the inheritance . . .” Jack sounded troubled.

Giving his brother a smile, TJ slipped off the stool and hugged Jack tightly, “thank you, Jackie! I’m sorry . . . really. I - - I didn’t expect this semester to be so hard. I’ll study more, I promise!”

Nodding, Jack hugged his baby brother and stroked his curls. “I know, sweetheart. It can get hard sometimes. Maybe you need a few more nights in, I’m sure Sean and Loki would understand. It’s your future at stake.”

TJ nodded and hugged Jack again, “I’ll make sure Sean and Loki understand. I’ll get that grade up.” He pulled back slightly and said, “I love you, Jack.”

Cupping TJ’s face, Jack gave him a soft smile which was so reminiscent of their mother’s. “I love you, too, Teej.” He kissed TJ’s forehead.

“Sean asked me to go out and get some of his family's gifts since he’s so busy . . . I’ll do that and then I’ll study all night,” TJ promised, pulling back, out of Jack’s arms. “I have two and a half weeks . . . I can email the professor for some extra credit.”

Nodding, Jack looked troubled. “Okay, Teej, but I think Sean’s missing out on an important part of the holiday if he doesn’t pick out the gifts himself. Will he be coming for Christmas dinner?”

“He promised he would,” TJ smiled, pale eyes lighting up, “and he did pick them out . . . I just gotta pick them up, ya know? Should be really easy and only take an hour.” He stepped back, heading towards the door.

Nodding, Jack walked his brother to the door. “You’re a good man and so very sweet. Don’t ever turn mean, TJ. Keep that wonderful heart of your’s.” Jack kissed his brother’s forehead again and smiled, looking pleased and a bit proud. “If you need a tutor, there’s no shame in that. You had one last semester and it was fine.”

“Yeah, Loki was a great tutor, never woulda thought he had a nice side though,” TJ beamed, pulling Sean’s keys out of his pocket and opening the door. “I’ll make you proud of me, Jackie, I promise.”

“I love you, Teej. You be safe, and I wanna see you for Christmas.” Jack smiled and looked towards Sean’s sportscar then back at TJ. “See you, Teej.”

“See ya, Jackie,” TJ called over his shoulder, waving at him as he jogged through the cold air to get into the vehicle.

***************

Three hours later, having braved the busy shops in order to pick up Sean’s gifts from several different stores, TJ started the car in order to drive back to his place to meet his boyfriend. He rubbed his hands together and paused when he heard his phone ringing. Picking it up, seeing Sean’s name lighting up the screen, TJ answered, “hey, baby, what’s up? I just finished getting the gifts and I was gonna start heading back right now.”

“Good,” Sean said, his voice cold. “You can leave them in the trunk and park down the street from the university. Don’t come meet me. Just leave the car and I’ll get the keys tomorrow when I go to the college to get something I left there.”

Frowning severely, TJ asked, “Sean, baby? What’s wrong?” He didn’t like the tone his boyfriend had, never having heard it from his lover before.

“Don’t call me that. Don’t ever call me that again, Thomas,” Sean said, a snarl to his voice. “I found out what you are, you whore. You _have_ been sleeping around behind my back!”

“What? I - - I . . .” TJ whimpered into the phone, heart beating heavily against his ribcage, “I . . . no! I love you, Sean! Please . . . don’t do this . . .”

“And how many other guys you say that to? Huh? I can’t believe this. You make me sick. At least if you’re gonna be a faggot, you should be faithful! But to sleep around . . . you give me a disease or something while you were at it?” Sean snarled openly.

“I’m sorry! Please, Sean . . . I - - I’ll get better . . . I love you! You’re the only one I’ve told that to, I promise!” TJ begged, his hands beginning to trembling, his chest swarming with despair. “Please, baby, we . . . we can get through this . . .”

“Weren’t you listening?” Sean sounded incredulous. “Are you such a needy slut you’d force yourself on an honest working man? I said I don’t wanna see your diseased ass any more. You’re not even attractive! You’re too skinny and you have . . . . a child’s dick. Ugh!” Sean sounded like he switched hands. “Drop my fucking car off where I told you and bring the keys to the admin office. No trace of you in that thing, either.” Sean hung up.

TJ’s mouth dropped open and he pulled back to look at the screen, watching the disconnected call for a few moments before letting out a sob. He tried to stop the tears, but once they’d started it was impossible to stop them. He turned on the vehicle, flipping on the headlights as it had gotten dark within the last couple minutes. Dialing Loki’s number, TJ held the phone to his ear with one hand, driving the car with the other as he pulled out of the parking lot.

“Loki Odinson, how may I help you?” Loki’s calm voice came over the line.

“Lucky . . .” TJ sobbed heavily, tears falling down his cheeks.

“Darling?” Loki sounded instantly worried.

“S - - Sean . . . he . . . he . . . we’re done. He found . . . found out about us!” TJ wailed openly, trying to focus on the road but it was hard with talking to Loki and crying.

Loki had the dignity and respect for TJ not to pretend he didn’t understand. Instead he said, “Darling, where are you right now? I can come get you.”

“Have . . . have to drop off his c - - car,” TJ reported, breath hitching with his sobs, “I’m such a whore! H - - he said . . .” TJ’s fingers clutched the wheel tightly, inadvertently swerving slightly into the other lane, making the other driver honk loudly; TJ corrected himself, getting back into his lane.

“Darling, are you driving _right now_? Please, pull over and tell me where you are. I’ll come help you drop off his car,” Loki sounded like he gathered his keys and such. “I worry about you, love.”

“I - - I can’t . . .” TJ pulled onto the less busy but more windy road that lead to the university. “Lucky . . . I’m sorry. I - - I gotta drop off . . . his car. He doesn’t want . . . want me in it . . .”

“TJ, pull over and we’ll have a tow truck bring him his damned car. I want you safe, love. You’re too upset to drive right now. Let me come get you?” Loki actually sounded like he pleaded with his roommate.

Over the phone line, Loki could hear the sound of tires squealing, metal breaking, and glass shattering.

“TJ!” Loki screamed. He immediately ran down to the landlord’s office and barged in, grabbing the man’s phone, still on the line with TJ’s phone. “TJ, darling, can you hear me?” Loki dialed emergency services with one hand as he tried to get TJ to talk.

After several long moments, TJ’s voice rasped out, sounding far away as if the phone had fallen out of his hand in the crash. “Lucky . . .”

“I’m coming, love, I’m coming. Stay on the phone. Sean’s car should have _On*Star_. Please, call out for help, as loud as you can, TJ, darling.” Loki put the other phone to his free ear and started giving as much information as he could, all while listening for TJ.

There was movement on TJ’s end of the line, followed by a pained whimper and the pattering sound of raindrops falling on the phone. “Sideways, Lucky . . .” TJ informed his friend, sounding like he still tried to move.

“On a hill?” Loki asked, figuring Sean must not have paid his _On*Star_ account or it would have already offered TJ help. “Stay still, my love. I have emergency services on the phone. You were at what store last, love?”

TJ gave the name of a store not too far from the west side of the campus, near the entrance that was located on the steeper hill. “Buckle . . . stuck . . .” he said after a moment, his voice almost lost over the sound of the rain.

“TJ, listen to my voice, my dear,” Loki sounded calm and firm. “Do _not_ move. Stay in the car and wait for help. It’s too cold and you’ll get sick. Then how will I bathe you?” Loki translated TJ’s location to the emergency contact then handed the phone to the landlord. “Do not hang up!” he ordered firmly. Loki turned and hurried out to his own car, hooking the phone to the holder in the dash and putting in his bluetooth device. “Talk to me, darling. I want to hear that lovely voice of your’s while I drive.”

“Sean . . . gonna be so mad at me . . .” TJ whimpered over the line.

Loki chuckled, as if TJ made a joke, “Sean will be thankful you lived and not worry about a stupid car, my love. You are far more precious than any material object.”

“He - - he doesn’t . . .” TJ voice faded and then came back, “ . . . anymore. He said ‘m ugly with . . .” TJ whimpered and sound of creaking metal denoting more movement, “with child’s . . . cock . . .”

“And he would know what a child’s penis looks like why? Does he hide something from the law-abiding world, perhaps? TJ, my darling, Sean is a blond fool and a control freak. I will treat you as a beautiful talented man deserves. Just let me find you . . . are you moving or is the car moving?” Loki sounded worried once more.

“Don’t know, Lucky . . .” TJ cried out softly, “everything is spinning, Lucky . . . think I - - I hit my head or something . . .”

“Do you hear sirens? I thought I heard sirens,” Loki tried to distract TJ, though he really hoped he hadn’t imagined the noise. “And see lights? Flashing ones of red and blue?”

“Red and blue,” TJ confirmed with another whimper and said, “are you coming to get me, Lucky?”

“I am at the middle of campus now, my love. I am on my way as fast as safe speed allows. Let the ambulance and police help you, my darling.” Loki kept talking as TJ paused, but was relieved to hear the sirens blare as a vehicle pulled to the road above TJ’s car on the cliffside.

“Lucky . . . my leg hurts,” TJ sounded dazed and his voice faded in and out through the rain. “Sorry . . . sorry I didn’t pull over, Lucky . . .”

“You rest, and I will discuss it later,” Loki advised.

“See red and blue, Lucky . . .” TJ reported, the sound of squealing metal coming over the line again, “think . . . think they see me?”

“Call out loudly, my love. Make them hear that voice. I know you have the lungs for it.” Loki turned a corner and had to slow. The snowy road was slicker than he liked.

The next noises from TJ were him following Loki’s orders, calling out as loudly as he could for help a few times before the only sounds to be heard were the falling raindrops.


	5. When Everything Crashes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **WARNINGS: Self-medicating, Self-esteem issues, injuries, domestic abuse**

The first thing that TJ heard was the beeps of various machines, and then the thin brunet could feel the soreness of his body, everything slowly coming back to him: driving Sean’s car back to campus, calling Loki in tears, not seeing a patch of ice until it was far too late . . . the car rolling for what seemed like years. He let out a soft groan, his eyes fluttering open and scanning the sterile hospital room.

Slumped in the chair across from the bed, Jack had his head in his hands, looking miserable but possibly asleep. Next to him, in another chair, sat Loki, leaning back, looking paler than before with dark smudges under his closed eyes, hand clasping TJ’s loosely in his doze.

Blinking a few times, TJ croaked, “Lucky?” He didn’t pull his hand from his friend’s grasp.

Loki’s eyes flew open and he bent over TJ, kissing his fingers gently. “My love, you are awake.” He looked exhausted, his ice-green eyes troubled and searching.

“How . . . how long was I asleep?” TJ asked, wincing heavily as he tried to shift into a more upright position.

Loki kissed TJ’s fingers again and smiled, “less than an hour, my darling. I am sorry I drifted, but I knew you would be able to wake me with ease.”

Nodding slowly, TJ glanced over at Jack, who was still slumped over in the chair. Looking back at Loki, TJ asked, “how . . . how long has he been here?”

“As soon as I got to the site and saw you being loaded in the ambulance, I called him to tell him which hospital. The rest of your family also insisted on coming but only two were allowed to wait in here. Jack was kind enough to let me be one of them. The rest are in a private waiting room.” Loki stroked his free hand over TJ’s curls, avoiding the cut and bruising. “You terrified me, my love, when I saw you so pale and still.”

“I’m . . . I’m sorry, I . . . I didn’t mean to crash, honest,” TJ insisted, looking guilty and worried. “I didn’t see ice on the road . . .”

“Hush, hush, my dear,” Loki soothed and lifted up to kiss TJ’s forehead. “Relax. You have done no wrong. Rest and heal, my love.” He offered a worried smile.

“Is . . . is Jack mad?” TJ asked softly, eyes flickering to his eldest brother and then back to Loki.

“No, but he is very worried, my dear,” Loki stroked TJ’s hair once more. “Would you like me to bring you some things to comfort you while you rest? The doctor wishes to release you to Jack’s home for a few days, the holiday only.”

“I . . . I can’t go home?” TJ asked, eyes wide, “am I being arrested?” He tried to sit up again, hissing as his sore body protested any movement at the moment.

Loki looked puzzled. “Why would you be arrested, my dear? I said you are being sent to Jack’s for the holidays to recuperate, only.” He reached over to help TJ sit up, using the buttons on the bed.

“But, why can’t I go home with you?” TJ whimpered, searching Loki’s face, his pale eyes still wide.

Loki leaned over and gently brushed his lips over TJ’s and whispered, “Jack has said I can come, too, my dear. Would you like that? Us both to stay there?”

Breathing out a sigh of relief, TJ nodded and settled back against the bed, “I’d like that . . .” he swallowed thickly and asked, “how long are they keeping me here?”

“When the doctor visits in a bit, he will decide. He thought, if you woke quickly, he’d release you tonight.” Loki stood and stroked TJ’s hair. “I shall allow your very worried Jefferson in the room while I get some things for your comfort, my darling.”

As Loki stood, TJ grabbed at his fingers, his bruised, battered face looking up at Loki, “you’re gonna come back, right? Please . . . don’t leave me . . .”

Loki smiled with confidence and settled a small timber wolf stuffed dog closer to TJ’s side. “I will be back before you leave the hospital, my dear. Trust the one who loves you.” He kissed TJ again and strode out, looking to David. “Would you aid me in collecting some of our things for the stay?”

David offered Loki his genuine smile and nodded, “of course.” As they walked out of the hospital, the blond man looked over to TJ’s roommate, “he’s okay, then?”

“Frightened and in need of support. His boyfriend broke up with him this night.” Loki sighed and walked out to his car, opening it for David. He slid behind the wheel and buckled up.

David slipped into the passenger seat, buckling up, before turning his attention back to Loki, “you mean Sean?”

“Yes,” Loki frowned and began the drive to the apartment building. “I am afraid I cannot like a man who lies, uses, torments, and says cruel things to someone. He said horrible things to TJ that I will never forgive.”

Frowning as well, David shook his head, “Jack said something about TJ failing his composition class? He thought it may be because TJ had been spending so much time with Sean lately . . .” David turned his head to look out the windshield, still frowning softly.

“TJ has, unfortunately, allowed his heart to rule his life and has let Sean convince him to spend _every_ night with him, until TJ is too tired to think straight. Sean takes advantage of him, makes TJ pay for their dates and such. I am glad Sean will be gone, but I should have done something to stop it, perhaps.” Loki shook his head, anger sparking his green eyes.

David sighed and nodded, “well, there’s nothing any of us can do about that now. Luckily, TJ is going to be okay, Sean is out of his life, and we can help TJ get back on track.” He glanced out the window to the apartment building Loki and TJ lived at. “You’ve done a lot for him. I can tell by the way he talked about you that he cared deeply about you.”

“I love him,” Loki said simply. “I could do no less.” He let himself from the car.

David followed Loki’s lead, slipping out of the car and letting the tall brunet guide him up the four flights of stairs to the right floor. He waited as Loki unlocked the door and then stepped in after him. David looked around the nicely kept apartment, “really nice place you guys have here . . .”

“Thank you. I pride myself on how we keep it, clean and well organized.” Loki threw a smile at David and said, “let me get TJ’s things first.” He headed to TJ’s door and tried it. Finding it locked, knowing TJ had given him permission to get things, Loki fished out his own blue key and unlocked the room. He opened the door and stood, horrified at the sight.

The bedroom was a mess, nothing like how Loki kept the rest of the apartment. Clothes were scattered all over the place; the bed was unmade and looked as if it hadn’t been made in a very long time. The desk was covered in papers that were scribbled over, ripped, crumpled, as if TJ had spent hours upon hours sitting at it, trying to compose something that just wasn’t coming out right. Perhaps the most horrifying were the empty bottles of alcohol lying discarded throughout the room. There had to be at least twenty bottles. The only things that seemed pristine were the wolves that Loki had given TJ, sitting neatly on top of a dresser which had it’s drawers open, mostly empty.

Loki’s look turned from horror to extreme worry. He stepped in, kicking bottles out of his way. “Oh, darling . . .” he murmured, turning around in a circle.

David followed Loki down the hall into TJ’s room and froze at the doorway, “what the hell?” He asked with the same expression of horror and worry, “this is TJ’s room?”

“Yes,” Loki’s voice sounded as troubled as he looked. He walked over to the dresser, took all the wolves, and turned, leaving the room. He walked into his own, immaculate room and pulled out two suitcases. Going to his own drawers and closet, Loki began filling both cases with enough clothes for both of them, placing the wolves on top of one set of clothes and closing that case. He then put toiletries, neatly wrapped, in the other and closed that one. Without seeming aware that David might watching, Loki had added condoms and lube to the one with the toiletries. Finally, Loki picked up both cases and walked from his room.

Blinking in shock, shaking himself from the horror of seeing what state TJ was obviously in, David followed Loki back out into the hall. “Thanksgiving now makes a lot more . . . sense?” David sighed and shook his head.

“Unfortunately,” Loki agreed on a sigh. He put down both cases in order to open the front door while pulling out his apartment key so he could lock up behind them.

Out in the hallway stood an enraged looking Sean Reeves, his hand poised up to knock on the door. He snarled at the sight of Loki, “where the fuck is TJ?”

“And why do you wish to speak to him, please?” Loki eyed Sean as if he looked over a piece of dog shit on his prized designer boots.

“I got a call on my phone saying my fucking car has been totaled. Now, where the hell is he?” Sean snapped, blue eyes looking past Loki and David into the apartment. “He hiding?” He tried to push past Loki to get into the apartment.

“Remove your hands. If you touch me again, I will consider it assault and be forced to defend myself,” Loki said, calm and slow, as if speaking to a child.

Sean’s eyes narrowed in Loki’s direction, but he did drop his hand, “I’m not paying for a new fucking car. That little whore can pay for it since he wrecked it.”

“Is your insurance company not paying for it?” Loki asked, crossing his arms, eyes narrowed and almost emerald in anger.

“I’m not paying _anything_. The insurance won’t cover a dime because TJ was fucking driving it.” Sean looked back into the apartment and then back to Loki, “now, you tell me where the fuck he is.”

“You should not have allowed him to drive if you weren’t going to insure him to. Foolish oversight, I am sure. Especially in winter, during a storm, when you’ve decided to upset him with false accusations and horrible insults then demand he act like some servant and _drive_ your car while upset. It’s no wonder he went over a cliff after skidding on ice. Shame on you for not being concerned about a crash victim’s wellbeing.” Loki towered over Sean, though he was much more delicate looking, “you have twenty seconds to remove yourself from my home and apologize for torturing my roommate before I have you removed and charged with stalking.”

“I’m not going to fucking apologize to _him_ ,” Sean snapped, “I know that little whore sleeps around with the whole fucking campus! Fucking whiny bitch is what he is.” He didn’t back away from Loki, outweighing the taller man in muscle.

“Do not,” Loki growled low, “project your own mistakes onto him. I have at least three witnesses who will swear you have slept with them, and will do so to your _wife_. I also have proof that you have been using TJ’s money to pay for gifts for your wife, in the form of the statements of his bank account and duplicate receipts sent to his email account. “I have been reticent to inform my roommate of your infidelity. But, when I am done cleaning the garbage from my home, I will go to the _hospital_ to let him know just what sort of man you are. I do,” Loki looked him up and down with a sneer, “have one question, “if your infant is a girl, how are you so familiar with little boys’ penises? Perhaps I shall ask campus security that.”

Looking appalled, Sean paled a few shades, his lips pulled into a snarl, “how _dare_ you accuse me of something so horrible!” He shook his head and took a step back, “you can keep the little whore. Sad fuck, anyways. Always pouting and crying.” The blond man shoved his hands in his pockets and turned to walk away. He stopped about halfway and turned, “this is fucking over, you freak! Who the hell do you think you are?”

"Me? I am Loki Odinson, son of the Royal Diplomatic Consul of the King of Norway," Loki stood tall, proud, and very aristocratic. "Forgive me if I do not know who _you_ are, I can never keep petty diplomatic children straight since there are so very many and they always change.”

Sean’s eyes widened slightly and he looked Loki up and down, something akin to regret flashing in his blue eyes before it was quickly taken over with anger. He let out an indignant sounding huff before turning on his heel and storming down the hall into the stairwell.

Loki picked up the suitcases and carried them from the room, turning to David. “My apologies, David, for not introducing you to Sean Reeves, son of Frederick Reeves, the Republican Senator of Ohio.”

Blinking, David watched Loki for a few moments before he said, “it’s . . . okay.” He paused for a moment before giving Loki a small smile, “thank you for sticking up for TJ like that. Had no idea that guy was married . . . obviously TJ didn’t either.”

“I should have said something, but TJ was always upset that he was not allowed to be an adult and make his own possible errors. I feel this was not a good lesson.” Loki led David down the steps. “I love him, but I may have driven him away with my silence.”

“Are you going to tell him, or wait until he recovers a bit more?” David asked, watching Loki as they headed down to the car.

“I shall tell him as soon as we get to Jack’s home. Then, if he does not wish anything to do with me, he will be safe in Jack’s care,” Loki decided, softly.

**************

Early the next morning, just as the sun was barely making its way into the sky, TJ hobbled into Jack and David’s townhome after his eldest brother unlocked the door and let them inside. The thin brunet’s body was covered in scrapes and bruises from the crash, but the most severe injury was a cut on the right temple down to his cheekbone which had required stitches. TJ knew he’d gotten lucky; he could’ve been hurt a lot worse.

TJ gave Jack an embarrassed looking smile as he passed him, waiting in the living room as the others made their way in.

Loki came from Becca’s room since she was not using it. He smiled at TJ and moved over to him, presenting him all three of the wolves from the apartment to add to the timber wolf from the hospital. “Hello, darling. How are you feeling?” Loki gracefully sank down next to TJ.

Smiling softly, TJ took the wolves from Loki, placing them on his lap and then holding the new timber wolf in his hands, caressing the fur with as much care as one gave a live creature. “I feel like I was in a car that rolled a few times,” TJ glanced at Loki and sighed softly, “and I’m . . . mortified and embarrassed . . . my whole life’s gone to shit.”

Loki reached out and took TJ’s hands, slipping his phone into one. “You have no reason to be embarrassed or ashamed, but I do. I kept something from you I did not think you wished me to tell you. I fear I did the wrong thing after all.”

Looking confused, TJ looked over at Loki, pale eyes shining with worry, “what didn’t you tell me, Lucky?”

Loki flipped on his phone and let TJ watch an interview a local news group did with Sean, his wife, and their toddler on Halloween about their trick or treating plans.

TJ watched the screen, mouth opening and eyes widening in horror. He let out a bitter sounding laugh and nodded, “of course he was fucking _married_! How fucking stupid am I?” TJ got up off the couch with a wince, making sure the stuffed wolves didn’t tumble to the floor. “He was fucking right! I am a naive fool!” He paced the room, despite the movement being extremely painful to the still very much injured man.

Loki stood and went to TJ, reaching for his hand. “Darling, you were a man in love with a well planned lie. But you are not a fool.”

“You saw it!” TJ shouted, not caring if the others in the house heard, “you saw what he was!” He pointed to his own chest, “ _I_ was the one that gave him over _five thousand_ dollars! I’m a fucking idiot! He was just . . .” the brunet’s voice cracked and he sobbed, losing his anger just as quickly as it’d boiled up. “He _used_ me . . .”

Loki wrapped TJ into a cuddle, careful not to overly hurt his injuries, and kissed his uninjured temple. “Yes, my darling. I should have said something. I was foolish to hope he would slip and you would see past the blind love. I would change it if I could.”

TJ sobbed and wrapped his arms around Loki’s thin but strong frame. He buried his face, uncaring about his injuries, in his friend’s neck, “I fucked up, Lucky. I - - I’m gonna fail this semester . . . I don’t have money to finish school . . . I - - I don’t have money to fucking pay rent. I’m just a fuck up . . .”

“No, you are not. You are a man who fell in love, as many do, and it was with a con artist.” Loki kissed TJ’s temple again, holding him, petting his hair carefully. “My love, let me help you. I can ask Thor for funding. And I can tutor you and help you with your grades.”

“But, there’s only two weeks left for the semester!” TJ wailed, his too-thin body trembling.

Stroking TJ’s cheek, Loki led him to David’s piano and sat him on the bench. He took back his phone and lay it on the piano, hitting record. “Play me that song you hum for me when we are resting, my darling,” Loki coaxed.

Looking up at Loki, eyes red from crying, TJ asked, “how . . . how is this going to help, Lucky?” He sniffled softly, slowly regaining control of himself.

“Your music soothes me, my love. Play for me?” Loki knew that TJ had been creating a song for him privately, and so was willing to give up his precious private song for TJ’s grade in the class. He could sacrifice a private moment for TJ.

Blinking, TJ nodded and carefully wiped at his eyes before letting his fingers hover over the keys for only a moment before bringing them down on the instrument. The melody he played was very complex and beautiful, performed seamlessly despite TJ physical and emotional pain. The song lasted for nearly seven minutes, never losing its complexity or beautiful flow, each note fading into the next, as good as any professional pianist would be able to compose and perform.

When TJ had finished, Loki let the music fade away then turned off his phone recording and handed the entire thing to TJ. “You’re composition, my love.”

Taking the device, TJ looked up at Loki, “do . . . do you think it’ll be enough?”

“It is everything she requested and more. It is also a complete composition and not just the parts she requested, thus, extra credit. Send it to her, TJ, and get your grade back. We will work out rent and tuition.” Loki brushed his lips over TJ’s and offered a soft smile.

Kissing back, TJ pulled away to look at the phone in his hand and then back at Loki. “I . . .” he swallowed and shook his head slowly, “why are you so . . . nice to me, Lucky? You deserve so much better than me.”

Loki smiled and touched his forehead to TJ’s, eyes closing, “have you not realized yet, darling? You happiness is vital to my happiness. I _love_ you.”

TJ sobbed softly, not pulling away from Loki, “I don’t deserve you . . .”

Softly, gently, Loki whispered, “do we ever truly feel we deserve those who love us unconditionally? You may not realize it, my dear, but I feel you are much more deserving than I, so we both are unsure and terrified. Let us soothe one another, as we have done over these many weeks. Yes?”

Swallowing thickly, TJ nodded and wrapped his arms around Loki again, “I . . . I think I love you, Lucky . . .”

“And I will be here, with you, until you are certain. If you do not love me in time, I will continue to be your loving friend and support.” Loki lifted TJ’s chin. “But, please, come to me when you are upset . . . not Jack Daniels or Captain Morgan?”

Pale eyes meeting Loki’s, TJ let out a shuddering breath, “it . . . it helped me to forget. I . . . I felt so worthless . . . like nothing I ever did was good enough.”

Cupping TJ’s face, careful of his stitched temple and cheek, Loki said, “may I never make you wish to forget, then, my darling.”

“I . . . I don’t think I am going to want to forget around you. You make me feel . . . whole again. I can’t explain it . . .” TJ let out a soft sigh, “I’m sorry if I sound . . . whiny and childish.”

“You do not sound either, my dear,” Loki chuckled. “You sound like a man in pain and exhausted. One who needs breakfast and rest. Jack, David, might I bring TJ to my room or is he required to have his own here?”

David looked to Jack and then back to Loki and TJ. The blond hadn’t gotten the chance to tell his husband of what he saw in TJ’s room back at the apartment. Thinking that it was best that TJ not be left alone right then, David said, without consulting Jack first, a rarity, “sure, Loki. Try to get him to nap, yeah?”

“Of course. I intend to merely hold him while he sleeps so he does not wake up alone.” Loki smiled at TJ and guided him to Becca’s room, where he had set up in.

TJ sighed softly and looked around his twin sister’s old bedroom which sat unused since she’d gone to college in Indiana and only came home for holidays. They’d have to figure out sleeping arrangements when she came back in a week for Christmas. “Lucky?” TJ asked softly as the taller man guided him to the bed.

“Yes, darling?” Loki said, offering a smile.

“Am I too skinny? Or have a . . .” TJ looked down at himself, let out a shuddering breath, and then looked back up at Loki. 

Loki smiled and dropped to his knees, unfastening TJ’s pants and pulling his cock from inside. He began caressing TJ’s length and started kissing it, sucking lightly at spots down the shaft and up to the head. Looking up and meeting TJ’s eyes, Loki smiled and hummed against TJ’s member.

Gasping softly, reaching out with one hand to grip at a bedpost, TJ fought to keep his hips still. He hardly ever was on the receiving end of oral. He whimpered and looked down at his friend, “is . . . is that a no?”

“I am much, my love, but I am no lover of children or even adolescents. You are all man . . . and all mine?” he asked, lifting his mouth but caressing and twisting TJ’s cock gently.

Groaning, TJ nodded slowly, “I . . . I want to be yours, Lucky. I . . . I want to make you happy and proud . . .”

“I will always endeavor to keep you happy, contented, and well cared for, my dear. And thus, you will be free to make beautiful music. And I shall always be happy and proud to be your lover, your significant other, your one true love.” Loki smiled up at TJ then went back to giving him oral.


End file.
